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A selection of the worst ‘Lancfessions’ that will make you lose faith in your fellow Lancs students

We now have written proof that Lancaster students are a little too frisky for their own good.


You would have to have been living under a rock to have missed some of the horrendous yet fascinating content emerging from new kid on the block, the group 'Lancfessions,' in the past few months. You can check out more at their Facebook page: (wouldn't let me input the link to the page)

We've selected some of the best (and by best we mean the most toe-curlingly disturbing that we could find) for your reading pleasure. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the cringe-fest!

The thirstiest:

1. A situation that would have been difficult to wriggle out of.

#lanconfessions1176House mates almost walked in on me whilst I was tied up mid foreplay

Posted by Lancfessions on Friday, February 8, 2019

2. Because there's nothing like the masses of questionable hair and puddles of unknown liquids on the floor to get you in the mood. Thank Gosh for the uni cleaners and their magic trollies x

#lanconfessions1255I regularly have sex in the library toilets, sorry not sorry

Posted by Lancfessions on Sunday, February 10, 2019

3. There's truly nothing more horrendous than overhearing a friend and never being able to look at them the same way again.

#lanconfessions1286So I got into a relationship with my flat mate halfway through first year and we had sex a lot…….

Posted by Lancfessions on Monday, February 11, 2019

4. A different type of thirsty, we'll be sticking to the VK's thanks x

#lanconfessions1144I once drank piss out of a kettle at pre's #furnessghetto

Posted by Lancfessions on Thursday, February 7, 2019

5. And then there's the sad reality for a lot of Lancs students…

#lanconfessions1288Where are you lot finding all these fantastic shags? All I seem to come across in Lancaster are guys who think 3 pumps and some moaning makes them a hot commodity

Posted by Lancfessions on Tuesday, February 12, 2019

6. Nothing like a bit of public thirstiness, but 100% of the shots you don't take don't go in x

#lanconfessions1099I've seen a fair few lasses with short androgynous haircuts and edgy clothing aesthetics about campus. Can you all please like this submission so I can slip into the DMs thanks.

Posted by Lancfessions on Wednesday, February 6, 2019

7. Clearly not everyone is so impressed, we couldn't have put it better ourselves. Sounds like the entire campus needs to be thoroughly disinfected

#lanconfessions1157When did our generation become so stank. Y’all need Jesus

Posted by Lancfessions on Thursday, February 7, 2019

The realist:

1. "I'm going to make it to every single lecture this term and start all my assignments early" says every student ever. Why do the hard work today when you put it all off until tomorrow?

#lanconfessions1204I came to uni expecting myself to get my ass in gear and start working hard for the first time in my life. I couldn't have been more wrong.

Posted by Lancfessions on Saturday, February 9, 2019

2. Forget one night stands and mad nights out, the only true thrill is having a friend from home staying in your little box room on a blow up bed, unbeknownst to the porters.

#lanconfessions1285One time, someone stayed in my room on campus overnight and i didnt sign them in at the porters. Was a real adrenaline rush

Posted by Lancfessions on Monday, February 11, 2019

3. We won't tell anyone if you don't x

#lanconfessions1242I laughed when a duck in the learning zone flew into the window

Posted by Lancfessions on Sunday, February 10, 2019

The craziest:

1. As much as we would like to believe that some 'mega lad' lancs student got frisky on the roof of the Great Hall, we know better. Nice try though!

#lanconfessions1181I almost had a blowjob on the rooftop of The Great Hall

Posted by Lancfessions on Friday, February 8, 2019

It seems like we weren't the only ones who cottoned on to the over-exaggerations and little white lies. Real or not, Lancfessions proves that either Lancs students lead mad, raunchy lives, or at the very least have extremely dirty imaginations.

#lanconfessions1282Let's be real here a lot of these confessions are so obviously bullshit. Come on, let's all behave.

Posted by Lancfessions on Monday, February 11, 2019

Make sure to keep up to date with Lancfessions via their Facebook page, where you can find information on how to submit your own confessions and keep up to date with the latest grim confessions from other students.