Terry’s guide to Valentine’s Day
‘I’d probably send them a McChicken Sandwich’
He’s a self confessed ladies man, the last of the true romantics, and he’s had more girls than you’ve had hot dinners.
Lancaster royalty Terry Madden gives us his fail proof guide to Valentines Day and lets us know where he’ll be heading this Saturday (in case you fancied your chances).
Terry’s tips for Valentines Day
- Send them a card – no name though
- Find out where they live – leave a bunch of roses
- Don’t tell them where you work
“If worst comes to worst, and that still did’t work, I’d probably send them a McChicken Sandwich or post one of those £1.99 vouchers through their door.”
Terry’s Perfect Valentine
“Nice blonde. Slim – not too slim. Good proportions. A nice smile. A good attitude. Someone who likes to have fun.”
“Bought this girl I fancied some flowers. Took her out for this nice meal, paid for it and everything, and I never even got laid.”
“I was working down London on a pipeline and was going out with this girl for a while. Ended up moving back to Lancaster, and a few years later I was sitting in a pub with another girl.
“Any how, some girl came up to me and was like “Do you not remember me?” kept pestering me and that. Turns out it was the girl from London, her Dad was a prison officer and they moved about a lot.
“Ended up finishing with this other girl, and took the one from London out on valentines day. Six months later – engaged. 12 months later – married. Year and half had our first child.
“Had three children with her. Divorced now though, had enough of her. I’m looking for a newer model.
“That’s why I keep going to Sugarhouse, there’s plenty to choose from.
“I mean they all line up for me there, I just don’t know which one to pick. They all look good – especially when you’re 53.
Plans for this Valentines Day
“It’s on a Saturday this year, it’s my day off. I’ll be out on the town pulling some birds probably, normally end up out till half four in the morning.
“I’ll most likely be in Hustle, they give me free entry in there. And they always give me three bottles for three quid there as well. Keep an eye out ladies.