Here’s how a typical Humanities student became a Guy’s Bar convert in three Wednesdays

Baptised by medics and snakebites


As a humanities student I used to despise Guy's Bar. I didn't understand why I was being dragged at least every Wednesday to stand in a queue for an hour (during which you sober up very quickly) to enter into a dark hovel that is generally drenched in alcohol and no matter how drunk you are, everyone seems worse off than you.

Guy's Bar has a long-standing tradition of being the most popular watering hole at King's. It's overrun at least every Wednesday by GKT sports team members for an evening of general debauchery and unheard-of levels of drunkenness.

Whispers down the queue told me that going to sports night is like being welcomed into an incredibly fucked-up family, or joining a cult. It's also hailed as a student bar to end all student bars – a GKT shrine, temple, and sanctuary.

End of exams partyyy #guysbar #kcl

A post shared by Emanuele Carlini (@the.carli) on

Last year, I only went about four times before I gave up. Guy's Bar was just not meant for me, I reasoned with myself – but why does it seem to be for everyone else? What am I missing?

In the spirit of investigative journalism (who are we kidding), I wanted to learn more about the popularity of Guy's Bar. So, myself and my Guy's Bar fanatic flatmate set me a challenge:

I would spend another three Wednesdays at Guy's Bar, with the people of my choice. Any negative comments about the night would be met with a punishment shot (that obviously, I had to pay for).

Finally got them developed😪 [Ilford HP5 B&W 35mm]

A post shared by 美宝 (@mabellamei) on

Wipe that tear from your eye, and witness my journey to becoming a changed woman:

Wednesday #1 (Christmas party)

Queue was horrendously long. Made up for it by singing boisterously with mates and doing jumping jacks to keep from getting cold. A girl who very nearly cried when she thought she had hurt me bought me a drink, and all was forgiven. Made a complaint – punishment shot, which somehow turned into a round of punishment shots for everyone else, 'because we all had to hear it'. Left thinking the night had been nothing special, but that it hadn't been as bad as I thought it would be.

Image may contain: Party, Woman, Girl, Female, Blonde, Person, People, Human

The lack of normality in this picture worries me

Wednesday #2 (End of January exams)

The thing I dreaded the most happened – I fell. On THAT floor. Maybe it's whilst I was sat down there that I had my grand epiphany – that it didn't matter, because I survived. In fact, I was picked up by my friend and a stranger wearing nothing but a pair of trousers and a tie, and then carted off to have a recovery pint. Maybe this isn't all so bad.

Image may contain: Person, People, Human

Your guess is as good as mine as to what's going on here

Wednesday #3 (End of May exams)

As a final challenge to myself, this Wednesday, I took to Guy's Bar alone. In true Guy's Bar fashion, I stood in the queue alone for about 5 minutes before the girls in front of me struck up a conversation. Helped one of them sort out drama with her boyfriend. Helped another scribble on her shirt for her themed outfit. Got drunk with all three of them, shared a post-Guy's Bar kebab at Café Rossi with another. Added all four of them on Facebook. I became aware of the true nature of Guy's Bar – like the teams it hosts every Wednesday night, it is truly about teamwork and family.

Image may contain: Working Out, Sports, Sport, Fitness, Exercise, Dance Pose, Dance, Music, Leisure Activities, Person, People, Human

Say it with me now: I like Guy's Bar. With a little perseverance and a lot of alcohol, and of course, some self-discovery, I finally get it.

I do still have one question though – why the Baywatch song, and why does everyone get naked?

The Tab King’s

last seen today at 01:58

Get KCL news straight to your WhatsApp

Find out which lecture is getting stormed by protesters, the best UCL trash talk and what your Pret order says about you. Straight into your DMs. 😘