These are all the types of people you will find at every lecture at King’s
Not even medics can escape the judgement
The lecture hall gathers a large variety of people that would probably never otherwise be in the same room – but they do share one thing in common, and that's their compulsory attendance.
It does seem however that we can relate a little to each type of person in the lecture hall – whether it's because their sleeping pattern is out of wack like ours (they just don't deal with it as well) or they asked the question we were thinking – that is, if we were thinking of something lecture related to begin with.
So why not reflect on all of us at some point in the semester – it's February and we're all so tired already.
The sleeper has a special place in our hearts because we want to be like him but we fear societal backlash if we fall asleep in lectures. We’re not sure if he doesn’t want us to see his face or if he’s genuinely sleeping – but it does make us wonder what he does at nights.
The one who's always eating and can never be seen without a Pret?!
We don’t think it’s necessary to have a 12 course meal in lectures, especially if you can’t do it silently – but then again, these people know the priorities of spending £4 in Pret rather than at Front on a sports night.
Much like the foodie, the muncher feels the need to eat during the lecture and if you thought the foodie was loud – you’ve got another thing coming. The muncher eats the loudest things – including that rattling crisp packet.
The worst thing is they're not even eating anything of substance but at least we can judge them for it.
The gossipers – ones with all the knowledge who you wish you could have but never will
You wonder if you’re back in high school watching the gossip, who points and talks about everyone. It’s not 2011 stop passing notes, and where the hell do you get all your information from??
The one who can never judge how long it takes to get to uni properly
You’d think she’d learn by now, but somehow she still keeping coming in late to every lecture – it’s distracting, and frankly quite unnecessary. Is it acceptable to give them a "10 ways to get to places on time" or is that too passive aggressive?
The one we all think we're paying £27K to, to hear them speak at lectures
This lad just feels the need to ask questions on highly complex levels that no one understands – including the lecturer. Leave it for the seminar, we have no idea what you’re talking about – unless he asks the question you've been thinking all lecture, in that case, carry on.
DO THEY EVEN GO HERE I'VE NEVER SEEN THEM BEFORE IN MY LIFE
You’re not sure if you’ve seen this person around, but you’re convinced they’re either new or they’re a transfer, or maybe they’re auditing because they have nothing better to do?
“The cougher” aka where's your immune system
You’ve started bringing cough medicine for this one, she coughs in every lecture and if it wasn’t so loud and disruptive it would be funny. Maybe you could join in to a cough chain, would anyone notice? Would everyone notice?
“I do all the readings three weeks in advance and will doubt my ability to get a First but always follow through"
Are you a little bit of all the above or do you truly feel like you're none of them – because we can guarantee, you must fit into at least one stereotype.
You know who you are and one day will regret being these people, but let's hope you're on the downlow on your course for now.
Featuring illustrations from Sylvie Dumont