May’s premiership so far -analysed by David Brent
The most comical premiership in recent history analysed by the infamous Wernham Hogg branch manager from Slough
Nicholas FordLeader of the Tories
The Leadsome demolition no doubt did wonders for the Maybot's ego back in July last year, but did her Party genuinely believe they had a new-age Thatcher, or did they not foresee the truth behind the snaky, poundshop Merkel they had just elected to lead them into a new Labour-sinking era?
Either way, she was happy to take charge of the country.
Legit footage of British feminists at hearing the news
NHS
The cuts, cuts and more cuts May has been trimming from the NHS has left it a skeleton of its former self, little did she know the real weight loss was to be suffered by the nurses who can no longer afford to feed themselves.
Because after all, nurses belong to the many, and May to the few… that's quite a nice slogan actually, someone should write that down.
NHS staff need to eat as well, Theresa…
We needed that side glance
The 2017 General Election
Maybot tried to override her default settings of 0-emotion during the 2017 GE campaign, otherwise known as "Mission Extinct Labour For Good, No, We Really Mean It This Time", but instead was as awkward as a socially inept grandma trying to get enough other socially inept pensioners to vote for her by persuading them to pay more for their own care…
MOOD.
Trump to Mump? Check!
That's right, the 'special' relationship between May and Trump is more than diplomatic or to do with trade, we all know they're trading things slightly more personal than weapons and car parts. The fact May has defied her Cabinet, her Party, the House, the Speaker, the London Mayor and 1.8 million members of the public by calling for a US President state visit, there might just be a slight romance to it all… Kind of like a boring, weird, and slightly repulsive Romeo and Juliet.
Fruity..
BREXIT
The mother of all headlines. May has been accused of not having a plan, being okay without a plan, and instead spending time planning on how to plan the planned sinking of Labour, whilst also having no plan in case no deal is made.
The only real organisation has been the bunking of Johnson, Davis and Fox at Chevening House in the first Cabinet formation last year in an attempt to merge The Three Brexiteers into a single, xenophobic, establishment hate pie. I really hope there's a secret plan.
Accurate representation of Britain in Brussels.
Aaron Edwards
Applications for The King’s Tab’s editorial team are now OPEN
We’re recruiting for Editor in Chief, News Editor, Features Editor, Social Media Editor and TikTok Editor
Taylor Swift announces surprise return to KCLSU The Vault to round off UK Eras Tour
Taylor played her first ever UK show at The Vault in 2008
Here are six essential fashion trends for King’s students this Spring
Jade BellExpect vibrant flowers, classic denim and a little bit of fur
American Football Varsity match abandoned after King’s player allegedly used racial slur on pitch
A King’s student allegedly called a UCL Emperor’s player a ‘n****r’ during the game
KCL Israel Society cancels event over safety concerns after speaker receives death threats
Lily PowellFormer IDF soldier turned charity leader Ely Lassman was branded a ‘war criminal’ online
KCL Women’s Hockey team robbed of a win by UCL during London Varsity Series
Hannah ConstableUCL Women’s Hockey team pipped KCL to the post by one lucky goal
King’s is one of the top 40 best universities in the world, according to new ranking
KCL has dropped three places in the rankings from last year
In honour of International Women’s Day, meet the influential King’s alumni
Selina HayreKing’s has been home to some incredible women throughout its history, so there’s a lot to live up to
A complete rundown of all the places Kate Middleton could be hiding at King’s
Rumours are strife for where the Princess of Wales could be after not being seen in public since Christmas Day, but what if she was stuck at King’s somehow
Look at these memes about the London Overground names while you wait for your delayed train
‘Babe, I’m just hopping on the Suffy G line’
We asked and you delivered: These are officially King’s students biggest icks
Unlike Anton with Georgia H, you’ll struggle to come back from the ick
The 10 best places to cry in London as a bitter singleton
Elisaveta IvThe best ways to fill the empty hole in your heart
Here are seven date night ideas to impress your KCL Valentine
Because we all want to get out of the situationship phase
Move over Valentine’s: Here are 10 activities for Palentine’s and Galentine’s at KCL
Boyfriends and girlfriends are gonna come and go, but this is for life
Here are five Valentine’s date ideas for every type of couple in London
Because you deserve more than just a £2.50 Tesco card
KCLSU to host a porn and pizza party as part of SHAG week
Yes, you read that right. KCLSU are hosting a porn literacy and pizza party to kick off SHAG week from 5th to 9th February
KCL wants to block off area outside university building to stop ‘vagrants’ sleeping around it
Staff are ‘constantly’ removing syringes and needles which are a ‘hazard’
Call for review of KCL counterterrorism course after accusations of ‘indoctrination’
A Foreign Office official complained the course was ‘biased’
KCL Tories condemned for discussing the sinking of migrant boats at booze fuelled debate
Labour’s shadow minister Jon Ashworth branded the motion a ‘disgraceful new low’
The 10 best songs on Taylor Swift’s The Tortured Poets Department, according to streams
Harrison BrocklehurstJustice for So High School!!!
Jess reveals she and Callum ‘no longer speak’ after he did something ‘unforgiveable’ to her
Ellie Ring‘I wouldn’t say he’s a friend’
Hi Barbie! Meet the student who has written her entire dissertation on the Barbie movie
Emily SmithNot her supervisor’s name being Ken!
Holidays and moving in together: Inside Tom and Molly’s adorable post Love Island life
They’re actually too wholesome
Baby Reindeer’s Jessica Gunning has spoken out about people trying to find the real Martha
‘I think it’s a real, real shame, because it shows that they haven’t watched the show properly’
‘Taylor Swift pub’ The Black Dog staff have spoken out about chaotic week mobbed by Swifties
‘We’ve got a Swift half pint on the menu, which people can get for free if they sing a Taylor lyric’
Kim Kardashian is ‘over’ Taylor Swift feud and ‘thinks Taylor should move on’ after new song
Taylor’s new album features a song called ‘thanK you aIMee’ which is believed to be a massive dig at Kim
From tattoos to moving in together: What are Tori and Jack up to after MAFS Australia 2024?
They’re in their own little bubble
More lies Jack from MAFS Australia has been telling his ex have surfaced and it’s chaos
‘He’s only staying with Tori because he’s backed into a corner’
Ben slams Ellie for being ‘vindictive’ on MAFS and claims she’s with Jono for ‘publicity’
‘She always played the victim’
Cast member Ben claims MAFS Australia 2024 producers mocked and ‘criticised’ his ADHD
‘I didn’t sign up to be taken advantage of through my mental health’
A look inside the wholesome life of Jessica Gunning who carried Baby Reindeer as Martha
Francesca EkeI can’t believe she’s not actually Scottish
No ifs, no buts: These are the absolute WORST episodes of Black Mirror ever
Black Mirror episode idea: Me being forced to watch these on loop
Inside the wild transformations of the Buffy cast, from the first episode to now
Sarah Michelle Gellar my ageless queen!
What have raunchy lovebirds Ridge and Jade been up since MAFS Australia 2024?
Not him getting her name tattooed on his back
Everyone’s wondering if Baby Reindeer’s on stage breakdown was real, so here’s what happened
Phoebe KowhaiDonny opened up about the sexual assault he had experienced whilst performing stand up
One MAFS Australia 2024 groom who made it to final vows has already got a new girlfriend
And apparently they dated before the show?!
Man falsely accused of being Darrien from Baby Reindeer has launched police investigation
He has involved police due to ‘defamatory, abusive and threatening posts’ against him