Everyone you’ll hate in the Maughan

It’s always the Mac users who hog seats

dumbledore funny harry potter hogwarts jk rowling KCL kings kings college library London magic maughan round reading room rrr

The Maughan Library is one of the most beautiful buildings on the Strand campus, and it’s certainly filled with an interesting mix of people.

Although we might hate to admit it, we’ve all been one of those annoying Maughan-goers at some point in our KCL career.

The Reading Room crew

Such snobbery

Such snobbery

The people who revise in the Round Reading Room on a regular basis are typically quite pretentious. Anyone who needs to compete for a seat just to study in an aesthetically pleasing room doesn’t have their priorities straight. It’s not like you’re going to be admiring the scenery anyway.

Just to make it clear to all of you Reading Roomers: you are not revising in Dumbledore’s office. Stop trying to soak up the magic radiating from the walls and do some actual revision instead.

The squatters

This isn't your bedroom

This isn’t your bedroom

Squatters are people who practically live in the library. They are pros at deciphering the Maughan’s confusing signs and can even point you towards the most comfortable place for a nap.

They often resemble Gollum, as many of them haven’t seen the light of day for a while. Although, thanks to the showers on the Lower Ground Floor, they smell fantastic.

These are the most mysterious people who frequent the library. They seem to have gotten out of the habit of  interacting with other humans – if you attempt to speak to them they’ll look through you, not at you.

Although this crowd might seem a bit peculiar they are probably the most academic, getting firsts on everything. With all that time spent in the library avoiding the sunlight, they deserve it.

The party animals 

Too much partying?

Because hoodies and shades never go out of fashion

Partiers spend most of their time trying to figure out if the Philosophy Bar exists and not enough time contemplating Marxism. This ultimately results in last minute library revision sessions.

They act as if they have just entered the Maughan for the first time in their lives, after having to ask someone where that elusive “Mogan” library is in the fist place.

The direction asking doesn’t stop once they arrive either. Due to heavy partying at Waterfront and a raging hangover, the library signs become even more confusing.

This group is probably the easiest to spot, as you can often see them sporting hoodies and tracksuit bottoms. Judging by the bags under their eyes, it would be safe to say that they’ve now pulled a few all nighters in a row and are only being kept alive by a dangerous mixture of Red Bull and coffee.

Will they ever learn to balance work and play?

The foodies

Thank you for this public service announcement.

Thankyou for this public service announcement

Foodies always have to have food on hand for their revision sessions. While they argue that food is essential for long hours of study, their neighbours typically disagree. There’s nothing like trying to read about Rousseau while simultaneously inhaling tuna fumes from the table next to you.

Crunchy food, like crisps, are equally annoying. After they spend a noisy minute opening the crisp packet, everyone must then listen to them loudly munch on them for the next twenty minutes or so.

They need to be told how to find the Maughan cafe (it’s on the Lower Ground Floor).

The seat hoggers

Someone's gonna steal that Mac mate.

Someone’s gonna steal that shiny Mac, mate

Seat hoggers are by far the most hated people in the Maughan.

It’s one thing if the person in question has just popped out for a minute, but an hour is just plain unacceptable. Walking through crowded room after crowded room only to be met with an empty seat with a coat and a MacBook claiming it is an enraging experience.

Who do you think you are, seat hoggers? If you’re not careful, someone’s gonna chuck that MacBook of yours out the window.