My experience with Piracetam

With procrastination clashing with the pressure to achieve, smart drugs are often seen as the salvation for students hoping to pass their exams, get into the perfect grad scheme and drink champagne on city roof tops whilst laughing at the plebs below.

Dreaming of champagne and the infuriated proletariat

It was late spring of my final year of Sixth Form and the dreaded A2s were around the corner. I discovered smart drugs browsing Reddit instead of my textbook, and after some brief research on the internet instead of brushing up on my essay technique, I decided upon a drug called Piracetam as the best starting point.

It almost seems too good to be true – it has cognitive enhancing and even regenerating abilities, leading it to be proclaimed as a treatment for dyslexia and dementia. It can reduce depression, anxiety and reduce mental impairment from alcohol. Best of all it has no proven major side effects, so you won’t switch gender or start sweating gravy.

In his excitement Walter mixed up his smart drugs with his painkillers

I only ever told a few of my friends; not many people take smart drugs in school. Everyone gets their rush from something though; some people jump out of planes, climb buildings, or make racist jokes without looking behind them first. I was living life on the edge ordering smart drugs from a dodgy Czech company which also sold animal semen. They came after two weeks and thankfully there was no order mix up with other aspects of the business. The dosage was two pills every four hours.

Piracetam slowly kicks in after a number of days, and after about a week I felt like I could concentrate on things more and generally felt more on top of things. For the first time I woke up in the morning feeling ready for the disappointments ahead.

At one point, after a night out, I decided I’d cycle the 15 cross country miles back home, in my skinny jeans, never having cycled further than 2 miles, and on a bike which was in such desperate need of oiling it lost speed going downhill. It was inappropriately hilly and my lack of road sense meant more likely hood of death than Richard Dawkins in Islamabad, but I made it with the rising sun. I would never have achieved that without this ongoing persistent drive that Piracetam gives you – it takes away the thoughts of giving up. It’s why a lot of body builders take it as well.

Salty…

I didn’t notice any improvement in memory – I suppose that was beyond repair – however I had at my disposal a months supply of a smart drug that was improving my concentration, mental stamina, and determination. So did I ace all my exams after days and nights of meditative revision? No. I completed four xbox games in quick succession and got some of the highest kill to death ratios on Call of Duty in my entire gaming career. Seriously, it was raining noobs. My gym sessions were also of a much better standard due to increased motivation.

That’s right. I gamed and lifted instead of revising. When I did revise, it was better quality and I could go at it for longer, however my will power had improved in completing a task, not doing it in the first place. In fact I was too disorganised and unmotivated to even keep up the dosage regimen after 2 weeks. I still have them lying around forgotten in some cupboard back home with an accumulating pile of hopes and dreams.

Piracetam seems far more beneficial to those who have genuine difficulty concentrating on something they actually want to do. Hence more suitable for hard working Oxbridge than the dilly dallying London urchins. However the Modafinil, whilst having attracted a lot more negative attention, is purported to de-activate your reward system, and actually make you want to do revision. Again this information comes from interviews with Oxbridge students so perhaps comparing their lack of motivation to mine is like comparing a headache to decapitation.With exams coming up it might be the next thing on the bucket list – your own personal Tab guinea pig.

Smart drugs didn’t make Phil any more inclined to complete his novel

I still did very well in my A levels and got into my first choice university, so I’m satisfied with the world class lectures I’m not going to. Last minute cramming got me to where I am without the use of smart drugs, however as I’m walking along the streets I look up at the young high fliers sipping champagne on the roof tops and laughing at me, and wonder if my luck will always be enough.