Get daft: a guide to Daft Friday

WHEN: The last night of exams (for those who finished mid-Saturday, please know everyone at Pre’s had a drink for you).

WHAT: A night of art, live jazz, ABBA-tribute bands, free Redbull, formal dress, growing pupils and extra-curricular activities… just a ceilidh, laser-tag, concert, bull-riding and HIVE TILL FIVE.

WHERE: Every room in the GUU is decorated with hand-painted illustrations (2021: Pixar), the theme changing every year only to be unveiled on the night.

WHO: Mostly sad and stressed third and fourth years, a few rogue second years and a couple of masters students who just want a hug.

HOW: This year there were three ways to get a ticket due to an extra queue-jumping guest trying to ruin the holidays (omicron you can’t sit with us).

Way 1: Join a queue before 11pm (any later and you aren’t getting a ticket babes) on a random Friday Night in November on the streets outside GUU. You’ll catch a few hardies, showing off their Bronze DofE certificates, but most will be freezing in hats and gloves wondering if they should’ve matched with that smiley person on Tinder, who said they loved hugs and A:TLA, for the warmth right now. At 9am tickets will start being sold and you’ll have to hope you remembered your GUU card (please get this at least the day before or you will be waiting in ANOTHER long freezing queue outside GUU at 4pm).

Way 2: Follow GUU on socials. See that they’re selling 100 more tickets at 12 noon on a random day the week before Daft Friday, and end up running to the GUU in the middle of an exam to get one.

Way 3: Continue following GUU on socials. Read the news that omicron is the Grinch and may cancel Christmas and buy a ticket (or five) off a random girl in the library the day of Daft Friday.

Ticket Acquired, Ready Steady Cook:

Now you’ve got your ticket, try to frantically find a silk, monochromatic dress or a black tux. Tip: bring a pair of slides/trainers for the 2am mark!

Submit your last essay, grab your toxin of choice and go to Pre’s at seven. (Some people may start earlier but I would suggest this is poor tactics).

Get to GUU at 8, 9 or 10 (let’s not lie, you don’t know what time it is) with your lateral flow, ID, proof of vaccine and go get your free vodka redbulls and chocolate fondue. Don’t forget to chat big talk about how you’re obviously gonna last to breakfast.

The world is spinning, dance to some sexy jazz and some sexual Timberlake, waffle to that guy wearing a cape about the symbolism of the sock in Monsters, Inc. (it’s Glasgow uni), kiss someone with a nose ring (it’s Glasgow uni), and take not enough – but still too many – pics with your friends.

Now, either a tactical chunder or a tactical nap and then grab some hot chips and curry sauce before going back to dancing.

Its 3am and I don’t remember anything else. It’s time to choose your adventure: find a stranger to get daft with, lose your breakfast token and beg a poor security guard for one or call it a night and amble home humming Dancing Queen mumbling, “next year… next year I’ll make it to the morning rolls.”

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