Growing up in Ipswich is severely underrated

Ed Sheeran was a teen here

@cs @hometown

Whenever someone asks me where I’m from, I say Suffolk. It’s simple and it’s easy, and I don’t then get the weird “you live where?” comments that come when I say Ipswich.

But Ipswich is more than its made out to be. Probably most famous for the fact we were home to Britain’s fattest man, this hometown is seriously underrated. Yes it’s a shithole, but it’s a loveable one.

Also Ed Sheeran spent his youth here, so clearly it needs some credit in life.

Cineworld was the place to go for the first date

It was the place to go, staring at that huge screen in the dark whilst wishing the person you were with would reach over and just hold your hand. Nando’s would either come before or after the cinema, obviously. And there would be some kind of tonsil tennis, of course. Whether it be super romantic and be by the huge weird ball statue outside, or in the back of the theatre, that cinema has seen a tonne of first kisses.

What school you went to really defined you as a person

If you went to the Girls school you were probably scared of the Boys school boys on the shared bus until you were about 14. Then you probably went through them like they were going truly out of fashion. The Boys School was actually a mixed school but it was how the two private schools in the town were normally defined. If you went to Copleston or Northgate, you probably had a more of a wild time and spent your Saturdays in the Skate park. And God help you if you went to Holywells.

What are boys?

Everyone knows everyone

It’s a blessing or a curse, depending of how your time at school went. But just know, that when you’re home and you run into the shops at 10am on a Sunday, you will run into someone you know. Because in Ipswich, everyone knows everyone.

So there is always so much gossip

Stories spread like wildfire. When someone got exposed as having a secret thing it was an “omg” moment for all the people in the town. Who cares if it was a friend of a friend of a cousin? That was gossip and it had to be spread. From graffiti in the pavilion in the park to that infamous video of the couple having sex outside Liquid, stories always exposed themselves. Secrecy is dead.

We have a sick festival down the road

Latitude. The place where we all spent our youth. Ed Sheeran, Mumford and Sons, Alt J and Ben Howard have all performed here before they hit the big time. Latitude is the place where summer friendships began, where friends helped friends out of the huge mud puddles and the sheep were dyed different colours.

Latituuuuude

You will run into everyone you’ve ever known in the Topshop in Tower Ramparts

How can a shop hold so many people? How can everyone you’ve ever hated be in one store at the same time? How many times can you pretend not to see someone? All questions we’ve asked ourselves, as we’ve panic bought the ugliest “edgy” top in a bid to run away from the guy we were texting when we were 15.

Sin is everyone’s guilty pleasure

It’s small and it is sweaty and it shuts at two but who cares? It’s the place to be on that tiny little street we call The Strip. Who wants to spend a bomb in Revs when you can go to Sin and get absolutely smashed for half the price?

Put your hands up if Sin is your fav

When Shakeshed shut, and Shakeaway won and there was no more milkshake rivalry

It was real and you knew it. You had your Shakeaway loyals, and you had your Shakeshed fans. But Shakeaway won and Shakeshed had to close and your 14-year-old self was a little bit sad that there was now only one milkshake shop in town.

Christchurch Park has seen more action than your own bed

Ah the park. Where families spend their days pushing kids in the swings, and angsty teens spend their time in the sports pavilion, slash in a bush. An actual bush. An infamous meet up for all that could not afford the cinema that week, CCP, its affectionate nickname, has seen it all. From underage drinking, to underage sex. That poor park.

The Half Naked Lady is our local legend

She’s more than just a myth or legend. She is the semi-naked wanderer, half clothed and ambling quite happily along the cobbled streets that make up Ipswich High Street. Perfectly harmless, and always able to fight the cold by not wearing any trousers, this half-naked-lady is the epitome of what makes Ipswich special.

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream

THAT ice-cream shop. Where you could go for Nando’s in your lunch break and pop across for all the ice cream you could possibly eat in your life. Perfectly placed on the way to the cinema, it is a hidden gem of Ipswich.

The purple shop that is actually entirely purple

When you were 13 and ready for your first ear piercing, but also probably too cool for Claire’s, you’d descend on the hippiest shop in all of town. The purple shop is entirely purple (obviously) but also probably Ipswich’s only answer to anything vaguely resembling edge.

Hippy Hill was the place to be in summer

When you were 15 and too cool to spend your summer days with your family anymore, but also too broke to spend too much money. People actually rarely got high on this hill, despite the name, because it was always ridiculously obvious to anyone with a brain what was going on.

Hippy Hill was also the place to be when it snowed

The speed. That hill is better than any mountain in the French Alps for sledging, which is why half the town’s population will descend on the hill to try and sledge down and not crash into any child/pet/other sledger that is in their way.

WEEEEEE

The Docks are the best-looking part

Who knew Ipswich could be so photogenic? The sunset docks photo is the classic pretty Ipswich shot, and to be fair, it is actually pretty beautiful.

Oh, and Orwell Bridge

You’re always like 10 minutes from a beach

From Felixstowe beach and its shitty arcade, to Southwold and its picturesque scenery, the people of Ipswich are lucky in the fact the beach is always close by. In the summers we got to spend our time at Aldeburgh Carnival, which was arguably the place to end summer.

Carnival

 Think your hometown is better than this? The Tab are running a competition for the best hometown this month, email [email protected] if you want to write about yours.