How to dress like an English Lit student

The Arts student: easily identifiable by the unlit roll up tucked behind the ear and the deeply profound facial expression as they saunter about campus in similarly dressed packs looking edgy as is humanly possible.

These not so elusive creatures can often be seen perspicaciously nodding to one another in their natural habitat – the Hillhead Book Club – while pondering the works of Gustave Courbet or discussing Plato’s stance on Democracy. Throughout my brief time as an English Literature student at Glasgow, I’ve often found myself an outsider in a world of “outsiders”.

Thinking of wearing some Modern clothing? Contouring? Even fake tan? Think again.

Before.

River Island, Mac and St Tropez don’t quite cut it in the vintage only realm of the Arts and unless you want to be regarded as though you murder small Dachshund puppies for sport, steer clear of anything tagged “NEW SEASON”.

These are the simple steps to successfully blending in with the majority of my course counterparts. If you are considering beginning an arts degree next year, take note.

After.

Step one – The hair
The Arts student haircut consists of an androgynous mix between a shaggy cut and Mary Portas’ bob. One bun will suffice but if you’re feeling adventurous go full on Princess Leia and go for two.

Step two– The backpack
Before putting on your backpack, use it in a game of ultimate Frisbee or batter it off the ground a couple of times for that “distressed” look. Make sure to pop in your 100 per cent vegan packed lunch box and MacBook Pro for added effect.

Deep in thought..

Step three – The mom jeans
The style staple of the Arts student. The mom jean can never be too baggy. Preferably vintage (or alternatively purchase from Topshop and simply rave about how vintage they are anyway). Pull up to roughly Simon Cowell-esque armpit level and team with your dad’s massively oversized belt if they are too big on the waist to keep that “vintage” vibe going strong.

Step four – The jacket
Personally, we went for the oversized fleecy lumberjack for warmth purposes. However, if you are a hardier breed, your Auntie’s neon skiing anorak from the nineties or a classic over sized vintage denim jacket will work just as well. After all, who needs to be warm when you can look this edgy?

Lumberjack vibes.

Step five – The t-shirt
The optimum colour would appear to be Forrest Green. However, any colour will do as it generally will be swamped by your massive coat anyway. Two sizes too small or two sizes too big is ideal.

Step six – The shoes
Chunky boots, scuffed Adidas Superstars or the low versions of Doc Martins. Team with a pair of Umbro white socks, et voila.

Black and white for added vibez

Step seven – The tattoos
Choose from one of the following options :

• An elephant silhouette
• An inspirational quote in an obscure foreign language
• A feather or the infinity sign.  Must relate to your “gap yah” in some way.

Step eight –  The jewelry
The key here is to look like your ear has been mugged by a serial ear piercer. If it doesn’t droop slightly under the weight of all that metal – you are doing it wrong. Adorn fingers with as many rings as will fit and a nose piercing is a definite must.

Great Grandmama’s ring collection.

Step nine – Makeup
Minimalist makeup only. Winged liner or a smudge of black kohl underneath is all you need.

Step 10 –  The Rollup
The pièce de résistance of the arts student attire. No outfit is fully complete without the rollup cigarette tucked behind your ear or hanging from between your lips. No need to ever actually light it, just let it sit there. Put your tobacco in a retro sweets tin for extra effect.

Instagram worthy.

There we have it. Your 10 steps to art world domination. However, when it all boils down, no amount of forrest green or bleached denim will make you feel like you fit in if it isn’t exactly you.

So, as much as you should probably leave your Armani blouse at home next year (for practical reasons of course) there’s no reason why you shouldn’t wear whatever you feel comfortable in. I will forever hold a profound respect for people who dare to dress edgy but I am quite content being extremely “uncool” in my Zara jeans and H&M shirt.