Most romantic spots on campus for time alone with your bae

It can be hard to sustain a relationship when you’re juggling essays, societies and basic hygiene.

But fear not, as the Tab has compiled a list of the most romantic places on campus for you and your special person to dry hump each other before your 4pm CEES lecture.

Boyd Orr Elevator

Make sure to be obvious enough to the security guards uncomfortable

If your guy is a two minutes in the sack and thirty minutes crying kinda guy, this is perfect for you. The wait for the elevator allows you the perfect time to get warmed up with some provocative over the clothes action that will make your fellow students green with envy.

Then on your thirty minute ride up to level three, you’ll have just enough time to slip it in, without alerting the 12 other people crammed in the lift.

Library Level 8 Sofa

Finishing your dissertation put you in a foul mood? You and your other half can cuddle up together in one of the beautiful Level 8 sofas, and just let it all go for your twenty minute break. While a quickie on the sofa is not advised, aggressive petting is sure to inspire jealousy from onlookers on the sofa across.

And nothing is going to inspire someone to finish their English Literature essay more than watching you attempt to deep throat your loved one with your tongue.

Fraser Building Disabled Toilets

You can try out all the positions from that book your parents gave you about safe sex

While the disabled toilets may have some time restrictions on them, with enough space to swing a cat, you can really go to town. Nothing gets the hormones flowing like the smell of stale piss, it’ll feel like deja vu from when you first met in the Viper toilets.

This will surely be a place to tell your future kids about.

Disabled Lift John Mac

This is one those of you who want to satisfy all the voyeurs out there

With a storied history of sexual antics already, why not add your name to the illustrious list, and let yourself be known as the most romantic motherfucker on campus. Unlike the Boyd Orr lift, there is nowhere near as much traffic here, allowing you to really wine and dine your bae before popping the big question. Anal?

University Avenue

Make sure to be as obnoxious as possible in the narrowest part of the street

Now, if you really want your undivided affection to be noted by the prestigious University of Glasgow student body, why not perform a passionate embrace as you split paths, one of you to the Joseph Black Building and another to the James Watt.

Students love nothing more than to be held up on their way from the Charles Wilson to the Western Infirmary, and that spark of your relationship will just show them what there is to live for before there Economic and Social History seminar.

GUU Virtua Tennis

When all you need is a little bit of a break from strawpedoing WKDs and downing pints of Tennants, why not make the short move to the GUU’s Virtua Tennis. Here you can both show what geeks you are as you play Virtua Tennis and tonsil tennis, with the score only ever being love-love.

Although, maybe with picks like this, it doesn’t seem to surprising that I’m single.