The truth about St Andrew’s Court

Over 100 freshers were promised common room, games room, on site gym, and a home cinema in the “luxury” accommodation.

But instead we were left with broken dreams and shattered hopes.

We thought we were lucky, as all of us had either missed our offers of accommodation, had Glasgow as their second choice uni or got in through clearing.

But from day one we realised that this accommodation was far from the description provided.

Location

So STAC was located in the city centre, just by Argyle street. Pretty sick for clubbing and nights out but actually getting into uni was absolutely laughable.

STACers, as we were affectionately known as, faced the subway every morning and night – a half hour trek onto campus was not ideal.

It made a lot of us actually feel pretty isolated from the uni. We were in our own little city bubble, miles away from the fun at Murano.

Travel

As said, the Glasgow subway was our firm friend during first year.

The loveable circle line transported us from St Enoch to Kelvinbridge or Hillhead every day, cutting our average journey time from over an hour walking to 30/35 mins.

But with uni refusing to subsidise our journey fee, we were faced with an extra spending of £50 a month just to get into uni.

Stop whinging, Wolfson, at least you guys get a free bus. We got zilch.

Luxury stuff

So, it’s fair to say that STAC was the definition of false advertising.

When we finally got given our accommodation, after at least a week of hounding the accommodation office about where we were meant to be living, the internet provided us with an insight into where we would spend the next year.

Or so we thought.

The beautiful common room, complete with “super fast internet access” was an empty room, with no furniture, no wifi, and no seats.

It wouldn’t be furnished properly for another couple of months, leaving us with no proper communal space.

Nevertheless, we made do, and spent the first weeks as freshers using it as a huge drinking area, and if we weren’t going out, then we spent it being cute and playing card games.

So much room for activities.

The common room and games room were finally (and I mean when the wallpaper was put up and everything) finished in May 2014. Note, we moved in in September 2013.

The gym, when finally established, was opposite my room for about three months.

My corridor stunk of BO, due to the fact that it was a tiny cramped room with no air con. Ideal.

It would later become the film room.

My corridor was also full of screaming, cackling girls, who apparently had never seen a six pack before in their lives, so they hung out outside my room, trying to get a glimpse of the guys with the pecs and abs they were never gonna pull in real life. Sorry girls, but it’s true.

Poor boys had to put up bits of paper on the inside of the door so that the glass was covered.

Ridiculous. Let them work out in fucking peace will you.

We also had a very scary lift.

Wifi

Lol, what wifi?

STAC, bless its soul, didn’t provide us with working internet for months.

And when it was finally installed it would go off every other hour, leaving students to work in the library in the West End until 2am and walk across Glasgow in the early hours.

It finally had proper working Wifi just in time for the May exams, and it was like heaven on earth. We could finally do shit at home. Amazing.

Except Murano had wifi in each individual room from day fucking one. Not that we were jealous or anything.

The Rooms

So I was a lucky one. For an extortionate fee, I got myself a single room, with an en-suite and a kitchen. All to myself.

Others were not so lucky, and were forced to share a bunkbed with strangers that they had never met before.

Rooms that were designed for one person, now had to fit two grown adults into it, often with barely any privacy.

Guests were a complete no-go for those in twin rooms, if management heard that you had a guest in a twin room, they were asked to leave.

One of my friends had four of her friends from Ireland stay for a weekend. They had to sleep in the common room.

Security and Management

This was probably the biggest joke of our accommodation.

Our management took their role so seriously that guests had to sign in and sign out.

One guest at a time.

The parties we heard of in murano were a distant dream for us in the city centre.

One time I hosted pre for my theatre pals, and had to beg several friends to help me sign them in, because our lovely security guard refused them all entry under my name.

The biggest drama was when some thugs came in and beat three boys up one night. One of the victims is arguably one of the nicest people ever, and as an eye witness to the event, I can say it was an act of violence that came completely out of nowhere.

But rules were tightened to such an extent after this, that it was like living with an on-site mum and dad.

And yet they wouldn’t kick the girl whose friends carried out the attack out of halls.

If you think Sturgeon is insane, this place was on another level.

The People

This was the best bit of STAC by a mile.

Obviously there were some absolute bellends, but you get them in every accommodation.

The majority of people were fucking amazing, and most of us still try and see each other as much as possible.

They, at least for me, made my first year a great one.

Despite the lack of furniture, broken lift, smell of BO and violent attacks.

Oh STAC we miss you.