Almost half of Exeter finalists are set to vote Tory

We’re sick to fucking death of poor people

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A lot of us must really like paying tuition fees – as almost half of Exeter finalists will vote Conservative in the General Election.

Despite being the party responsible for scrapping EMA (R.I.P), letting Michael Gove have any say over education policies and, of course, tripling our tuition fees, a High Fliers report revealed final years are most likely to vote Team Cameron in the upcoming election.

The survey shows how 43% of final years are likely to vote for the Tories, which, let’s be honest, is not exactly a surprising answer from a uni populated with white, middle-class, privately educated, Home Counties-based voter

He’s just so right

The next most popular party was the Greens with 26% of the vote, while only 21% are set to back Labour.

Just 1% of finalists will be voting UKIP. We may be middle-class, but we’re not stupid.

Nick Clegg was able to win over only a few pity votes after the student fees debacle, with only 8% offering him a second chance in government.

We want you to stay

However, 44% of those asked said they didn’t think the election results would actually make a difference to their lives, so maybe everyone is still disheartened with democracy or upset they can’t move to Scotland and vote for Nicola Sturgeon.

Either way, Ben Bradshaw is still nervously awaiting the 7th May to see if we actually have the power to kick him out of his seat. The likelihood of him losing his seat is just 22% – so we must be set for a real nail-biter.