The hardships of living in Point Exe

Where?


Exeter promises all things great: a decent education, a beautiful campus and of course, plenty of attractive students (a solid 6/10 and a bit more for the bod in most cases).

So apart from the disappointing nightlife, what else could tarnish an innocent first year’s university experience?

This year saw the arrival of around 4,000 fresh, all applying for halls that promised the ultimate student living experience at a campus university – Birks Grange, Lafrowda and Holland Hall obviously being the most popular choices.

To anyone who got their preferred choices, I congratulate you, you definitely do not understand the privilege you have been given.

I”ll take Lafrowda please

Point Exe, a dooming grey building that’s been under a slight attempt of modernisation, looks on the outside like any other 80’s correctional facility for the mentally ill.

With the additions of an automatic door that doesn’t always work and a laundry facility to compete with the launderettes straight off the set of pre-noughties Eastenders, for the 300 students that were rejected the campus living lifestyle they dreamed of, this is home, and it’s best to make the most of it.

The awkward silence that follows after convincing people that “Point Exe” does actually exist, particularly to anyone in the far away, mystical lands of St Davids is one that every Point-Exer has experienced. It’s a moment of shame unlike any other.

The only way to get through the confused, judging looks of the Birks Grange-ers and Holland Hall-ers is to plaster on a fake smile and set out to explain that no, this was not my first choice, and yes, I am waiting for one of you to drop out of uni so I can take my much deserved place on campus. Preferably within a 5 minute walk distance to the Lemmy and the Ram.

The walk up to campus from the bottom of St Davids makes Cardiac Hill look miniature in comparison. It’s essentially a mountain trek up Everest, and a daily expedition that is taken out by many in order to make the most of their £9000 a year university experience.

Instead of rolling out of bed at 8.55 for a 9am lecture, we have to get up at 7.30, look into the depths of the misty weather and set our sights onto the Physics building ready for the 20 minute walking hell that awaits us.

Of course, there are solutions for the lazy residents of Point Exe.

Some Holland Hall wannabes have Apple Taxi tabs going to into the thousands without the trust funds to match. They’ve decided that the limited university run mini cabs up to campus in the morning and back down to St Davids in the evening are most definitely not appropriate for them.

They’d rather be sat comfortably in the back of their executive class taxi for the 5 minute drive to campus as a reminder of their chauffeur-driven days back home (somewhere in the home counties).

Chauffeur life

In all fairness, living in Point Exe is probably a lot better than the horrific confines of Moberly with low enough standards that are said to meet the requirements of a modern day Favela.

Life Saver – The mini bus

The Point Exe inhabitants have accepted their misfortune and a small community has been formed. We host regular block parties a month that even occasionally attract some very rogue campus dwellers, greeting them warmly with a sophisticated glass of “Point EXE on the Beach” – a rogue alcoholic beverage brewed by two French and Geography Students living at Point Exe.

Being a 2 minute walk from St Davids Station is somewhat comforting for the point exe-ers, guaranteeing a direct escape route from the hellish halls.

If they’re ever close to a mental breakdown, then the resident burger van man (fondly referred to as ‘Ebo’) is always there for a Messy Mega Special Burger – a beautiful concoction of 2 fried eggs, 2 rashers of bacon, 2 burgers and as much cheese as required.

It definitely has nothing on the TP burger van.

Ebo on top form after a Saturday Lemmy

St Davids Station looking as mighty as always

Even so, we still can’t stray away from the fact that we are all Lafrowda rejects. No one will ever understand our pain and hardships. Just rememeber that even though you may not see us around all the time, or you may have not even heard of us before today, we do still exist…

We didn’t choose the Point Exe life, the Point Exe life chose us.