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Clubbers of the Week

No signs of slowing down


It's Sunday evening. You see that clubbers has popped up on Facebook. The tags and comments start flooding in.

Could it be you? You jived your way through Juju's this week, "candidly" canoodled that boy at Creme, slut-dropped to every remix at Rascals.

Just once in your life you'd like a chance at fame. Everyone gets their 15 minutes and these could be yours. You'd even take Best of the Rest ffs. Oh, to be praised as you strut into your Monday 10am, all eyes on you, whispers of jealousy as you walk past everyone. Yep, I know them. Saw them on Clubbers this week.

Did you make it?

Well, only one way to find out.

Shall we?

Stunner of the week

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Easy, breezy, beautiful, Flare Mondays @ WhyNot

Runners up

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I'll have my publicist be in touch with your frog backpack

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Dropped it lower than my dating standards, well done

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But, of course

Creeper of the week

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It's me, I'm Cathy, I'm by the DJ booth wya?

Runners up

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Look closely

WTFs of the week

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Going out sucks nowadays

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The bar is low, but I can go lower

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Always ends up like this after a night at Creme

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She looks really good next to you mate

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'Hey guys meet my friend from home'

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I don't believe in love. But, I do believe in licking your friends faces.

Wankers of the week

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A nice Tuesday night Corona-fuelled sesh, lovely

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2010 called, been looking for you since you ran off the set of that LMFAO music video.

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Pointing is rude.

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Simmer down mate, it's Juju Club not the Vfiles NYFW afters

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I'm sorry your mixtape didn't take off. No need to take it out on the Flare Mondays photographer

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VKs, vodka, and that children's birthday banner.

Mutant of the week

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I'm glad you're doing okay, was worried for a sec x

Runners up

Image may contain: Party, Music, Leisure Activities, Night Life, Night Club, Club, Person, People, Human

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How I feel when I avoid awkward conversation with someone I kinda know

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Too cold for ice lollies love

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Mutant of the week runner up, but make it cute

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If you're talking to someone and their pupils are this dilated it either means they think you're fit or they've just taken their weight in MD.

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Young and unrequited love

Heroine of the week

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Long sleeve tops at the clurrrb are a gamble, but one of us has to do it

Runners up

Image may contain: Party, Music, Leisure Activities, Person, People, HumanImage may contain: Arm, Music, Leisure Activities, Person, People, Human

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'Let's get food'

Hero of the week

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'If I were prime minister tequila shots would be £1 EVERY day of the week'

Runners up

Image may contain: Person, People, HumanImage may contain: Swimwear, Clothing, Bikini, Music, Leisure Activities, Person, People, Human

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'Dude come back, I'm trying to show my mum I made friends at uni'

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This quarter's statements show that I've spent a good chunk of the budget on jaegerbombs

Unhappy clubbers of the week

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U wanna fight? After God's Plan plays tho

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'Out of three contact hours, how many have you missed this week?'

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Impressed? Definitely not

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Someone save her

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Should've just stayed in and watched Twin Peaks for the fifth time, jheez

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Someone get the man on the left an ibuprofen

Best of the rest

Image may contain: Party, Person, People, HumanImage may contain: Paper, Flyer, Brochure, Poster, Music, Leisure Activities, Person, People, HumanImage may contain: Party, Person, People, HumanImage may contain: Crowd, Music, Leisure Activities, Person, People, Human

Image may contain: Performer, Musical, Swimwear, Clothing, Bikini, Music, Leisure Activities, Person, People, Human

'Do you really want to see how low my standards can go'

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Jaegerbombs are the secret to essential youth, I read that on Into the Gloss

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Blonde hair black bombers

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Credits:

Ben Glasgow

David Wilkinson // Empirical

Neil Stewart

James Gourlay