Quit bitching about the weather

If I hear one more first year or one more exchange student complain about the cold, I’m going to lose it.

You chose to come to Scotland, and the majority of you seem surprised when it’s consistently below 0°. IT’S SCOTLAND. Unless you were yanked by your haunches from the equator and unwilling dropped at the university, I feel no pity for you.

Look how cute that is

If it weren’t freezing cold for half the year, then there would be no excuse for you to wear cosy jumpers and crazy ski jackets every day – and what kind of life would that be? And even if you’re not into cosy jumpers and jackets that have been regurgitated by the 70s, then you can layer up (adding a puffer vest and scarf to your outfit is the easiest way to look fashionable anyway).

And what better excuse do you need for eating terrible food than the weather? Yes, I’m having hot chocolate for breakfast – it’s cold outside. Yes, I’m having Sainsbury’s cookies in the microwave for lunch – it’s cold outside. Yes, I’m having another roast for dinner – it’s cold outside.

If your friends don’t understand the desire for unhealthy food when it’s so cold outside then you should 1) find new friends, and 2) try out the excuses of “holiday weight” or “adding a layer of blubber because it’s the easiest way to look fashionable anyway”.

My last and potentially most powerful point, snow. It’s the best excuse for being distracted in a lecture or tutorial, what fills your entire snap story feed, and is one of the few reasons left for fully grown adults to go outside and just enjoy being outside.

LOOK AT IT

And if you’re still unconvinced, maybe you should be at a different uni. Try Exeter, Bristol or Timbuktu.