The definitive ranking of college potatoes

Just thinking about it makes me hungry


There are three things that are guaranteed in life. Death, taxes, and potatoes at every college meal.

We may all have our differences: whether it is being posh and weird at Hatfield, being constantly tired at Aidan's, or being tragic at Trev's, there is one thing that can unite all Durham students: College potatoes.

The infamous hash-browns on the weekend, or the golden curly fries, potatoes bring joy to every college meal.

But the question arises: which is best? Here is our definitive ranking of every college potato:

10. Potato discs

Often unnoticed, often undercooked, these potatoes are bland and boring. They are as interesting as my toenails and can easily be missed. They don't reflect the high level of college carbs.

Thank u, next.

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9. Jacket potatoes

Whilst they can be a delicious meal if served with the correct toppings (cheese and tuna always) they are dull, sad and boring if eaten alone.

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SAD

8. Boiled potatoes

These are what your mum orders at a restaurant instead of chips because they are supposedly more healthy. This can only mean that they are less delicious.

7. Chips

Controversial opinion (trigger warning).

Whilst the Friday fish and chips is an iconic dining experience, when you think about it the chips just do not live up to expectations.

I'll put it this way, not quite Bell's are they…

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They don't quite cut it

6. Mashed potatoes

Whilst this kind of potato is more enjoyable to eat than those already mentioned, there is really nothing special about the Durham version. Mash at home is equally good.

However, this can be redeemed slightly with the addition of gravy.

5. Hash Browns

Everyone looks forward to a good Saturday brunch, especially the so-called 'breakfast potato.' However delicious it can be, these are always slightly too oily and greasy to rank any higher.

4. Roasties

These small balls of potato are so moorish, I've seen friends go back for seconds and even thirds – and by friends, I mean myself. They strike a perfect balance between crispy outside and soft inside resulting in maximum deliciousness.

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If he dips them in yogurt, I'm leaving

3. Roast potatoes

An absolute classic, these are not to be missed. Sunday roasts would be nothing without them. Eaten preferably with gravy. Lots of it.

2. Wedges

Just missing out on the top spot are these delicious slices of potato heaven, complete with herbs (perhaps the most seasoning on Durham college food ever). Not to be missed.

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damn son

1. The curly fry

Hungover? Curly fries.

Stressed about summatives? Curly fries.

Just been dumped? Curley fries.

They are the answer to all our problems. I haven't met one person that dislikes them (how could you hate them?)

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with mayo and ketchup of course

Here's to carbohydrates and gaining at least a stone in first year.