We tried every hangover cure so Klute never kills you again
Some of them actually worked!
We’ve all been there. The pounding headache, the stench of vomit coming from the communal bathroom, wishing you’d drunk that pickle juice last night to prevent the mess you’re currently feeling like.
Every day I get more and more fed up with listening to sick-smelling, dead-looking, whiny students bragging about how lit their night in Missoula was.
Thus, I decided to recruit some people to try out every hangover cure so you can make those pesky 9ams, and be a little less annoying.
Cure 1: Rubbing lemon juice under your arms before you go out
“I went into this with a positive attitude; I was all ‘If life gives you lemons…’
“It was meant to help with dehydration but all it did was made me smell weird so I didn’t even pull. I won’t be bitter about it though.”
Cure 2: Drinking pickle juice
“I woke up in a bit of a pickle and this didn’t help.
“It did not cure my hangover. It made me throw up. Although that could have been the 9 shots of tequila.”
Cure 3: Eating a raw egg
“After shelling out my cash on a fair few voddys, this was not egg-xactly what I planned on doing after an egg-xcellent night. Safe to say I feel a bit scrambled.
“However, I think this really cracked my hangover and I can get on with having a smashing day.”
Cure 4: Practising Voodoo
“Although I was meant to put 13 pins in the cork of my bottle, my student loan didn’t quite cover corked bevs, so I settled for the lid of my Nikita instead.
“It cured my hangover immediately and I now worship Beelzebub.”
Cure 5: Sleeping for the rest of the day
Matt was not available for comment.
Cure 6: Sweating it out
“Balance wasn’t perfect but a bit of fresh air did me some good.
“Wait…are you supposed to catch the ball?”
Cure 7: Drinking sugary drinks, e.g. orange juice
“Orange I glad I tried this! I woke up feeling fresh as a daisy. 10/10 would recommend as hangover cure.”
Cure 8: Eating carbs before bed
“Live and die for those cheesy chips. Would like to thank Paddy’s for the 8kg weight gain, but also the eased hangover due to the soakage.”
Cure 9: Ingesting ginger
‘The ginger was supposed to settle my stomach, but considering I almost threw up into my breakfast the next morning I’m going to say it didn’t work.”
Cure 10: Hair of the dog
“Carrying on drinking the next day made me feel amazing…
“not only did I forget that I was hungover but I forgot to do all my summatives too.”
Cure 11: Not going out
“I feel fine.”
So there it is folks. If you want to make the sesh and make those grades, looks like you’ll be eating a raw egg every night before bed. Soz vegans.