How to ace your tutorial without doing any work

‘Ah, yea, I couldn’t find that book in the library…’


It’s the moment all undergrads dread. Sat in a tutorial, having wasted last night scouring the deepest depths of Netflix, the tutor in that module you dread has called upon you to answer a question.

We all know that if you get into that situation, you’re fucked. But how to avoid it in the first place? Here’s our handy guide, so you won’t have to think about the consequences of not studying until your third year exams.

Entrance

 

Smile and be confident. Enter with a bold ‘hello’ or even a ‘hello how are you?’ if you’re feeling particularly courageous.

Smile and breathe. Do not show your fear. Do not let them know that you have done no preparatory work for this next hour of your life.

This is part one of the stunning performance you’re about to perform.

Choose your seat

 

Now you’re faced with a decision. You could sit with the gals who dgaf. They look as hungover and unprepared as you.

You could sit and gossip about the antics the night before and chat about how you’re all totally screwed for this tutorial. Wrong. You should sit with the people who answer questions in lectures and have the reading with them, which of course has been highlighted and annotated as instructed. They are the ones getting the most value for their £9000.

The few precious minutes before the tutorial starts are precious and should be fully taken advantage of. Ask them quickly (and subtly), how they found the reading and try to catch the slightest idea of what this tutorial is actually about.

Get a word in early

 

Tutorials always start with easy topics and progress into topics that make everyone realise a-levels were definitely not harder than a degree.

The key here is to get in early. This way when the tutor asks a harder question he won’t pick on you because you’ve already contributed.

They will think ‘no don’t put them on the spot, they’re an enthusiastic and intellectual member of the group’ and they will pick on the bad gals as mentioned above.

Nail your concentration face

 

When the time comes for the harder questions, you have to have this face nailed.

You need to look interested and attentive, responsive and observant. No eye-contact here is also vital.

Leave 

 

Pack your things and leave with a big smile on your face, quickly.

Skip merrily back to your room to continue binge watching your chosen Netflix series, after all, you’ve earned it.