Meet Collingwood F: The underdogs tearing up the Durham Pool Leagues

‘Pot shit get dished’


Forget rugby, football, or lacrosse…pool is the white-knuckle ride of Durham’s sporting achievements, and no team has surprised pool fans as much as Collingwood F.

The team may be low down in the alphabet but they’re rapidly climbing the league rankings. After beating a division one and premier league team, they reached the quarter finals of the trophy match, going out in a baize of glory.

The Tab spoke to the rising stars to find out what it is like to go from underdog to top dog:

Alex

Nickname: Lefty

When did you first discover you were a pool prodigy?

When my Uncle Ron took me to a working men’s pub when I was ten, gave me half a pint of Guinness, gave me a cue, and said “Alex, lad, one day you’ll be playing for Collingwood F.”

What obstacles did you have to overcome on your journey?

My Uncle Ron was a prisoner of war during World War II, so during that time I couldn’t practice pool with him.

How do you cope with your large fan base?

It’s a struggle. Girls throwing themselves at me gets tiring eventually.

Any advice for wannabe Collingwood F players?

Everyone is better with a few pints in them.

What’s the reason behind your nickname?

Uncle Ron was a communist.

What would your motto be?

Suck his eyes out.

 

Elliot

Nickname: Belliot

When did you first discover you were a pool prodigy?

I had a pool table installed in the womb.

What obstacles did you have to overcome on your journey?

The Durham hills en route to a match.

How do you cope with your large fan base?

Excel spreadsheet.

Any advice for wannabe Collingwood F players?

F is just a number.

What’s the reason behind your nickname?

I got banned from Inshanghai. Turns out it wasn’t quite an ‘all you can eat’.

What would your motto be?

I’m just doing this for the frame.

 

Danny

Nickname: Bench

When did you first discover you were a pool prodigy?

In the pub while eating McCoy’s crisps.

What obstacles did you have to overcome on your journey?

Being a lightweight and the 28 birds.

How do you cope with your large fan base?

I don’t have any fans apart from Jake and the McCoy’s factory.

Any advice for wannabe Collingwood F players?

Join the A team first, there’s a 33 per-cent success rate.

What’s the reason behind your nickname?

I’m dench.

What would your motto be?

Pot shit get dished.

 

Jake

Nickname: iBrows

When did you first discover you were a pool prodigy?

When I was called up to play for Collingwood A and Danny replaced me.

What obstacles did you have to overcome on your journey?

Danny replacing me on the A team.

How do you cope with your large fan base?

I’ve kept pretty grounded. Fan mail still clogs up my letterbox, but the fans have made me the man I am today.

Any advice for wannabe Collingwood F players?

Have nothing to do on Tuesday evenings and get in my good books. You’ve got to make me like you more than I like Danny.

What’s the reason behind your nickname?

See photo.

What would your motto be?

Always pick yellow unless it’s snow.

 

Darrel

Nickname: The Bard

When did you first discover you were a pool prodigy?

About a year ago.  It’s been a strong year – I’m very pool-talented.

What obstacles did you have to overcome on your journey?

Wednesday morning fitness has taken a back seat because of the wild Tuesday nights playing pool.

How do you cope with your large fan base?

I just thrive off my fans.

Any advice for wannabe Collingwood F players?

You’ve got to put in the practice hours – I play pool for 6 hours a day. Of course, there’s also the compulsory gym sessions.

What’s the reason behind your nickname?

Apparently I look like a Shakespearean character.

What would your motto be?

Once you go black, you never go back.