Caps aren’t edgy, they’re just stupid

We’re indoors you moron


The cap craze has struck our social lives and they’re everywhere – the classic ‘roadman’ looked defined by a generic vintage jacket and an unnecessary cap.

Yes, in these most gap-yah times, many feel the urge to express themselves, but the sea of caps in lectures is annoying us all and someone had to say it. Swaggering around campus in the rain with your cap on doesn’t make you look cool, it makes you look like someone with poor judgement.

Admittedly, they can be quite comfy and give you that boost of confidence you need, but you’ve only listened to Skepta once so don’t pretend you’re a badman. You watched Straight Outta Compton at your local multiplex and came out yelling ‘fuck the po-lice’.

But this isn’t Compton, it’s not even South London, this is Durham: home to cobbled streets, and old people visiting world heritage sites.

This must stop. There’s no need to wear a cap while writing an essay in your room, eating in the dining hall, and even at the gym (I mean seriously?).

We all want to be Bieber but let’s face it, he can wear what he wants because the man is a God. You, on other hand, are a rich kid from the South East trying to be a ‘roadman’. Bieber takes his cap off and all clothing in the audience drops to the floor. Take yours off and you reveal the shocking lid your mate gave you the other night.

Every wanna-be BNOC wants to follow the latest trend, there was a time when if Topman started selling bin bags, everyone would catch on and wear them.

I can understand they may come in handy in preventing last night’s pull noticing you around Elvet and they are ideal if you’re simply having a bad face day. But you look like a clown.

They’re designed to keep the sun off your face: this is Durham – there clearly is no sun. They come in different shapes and sizes and in the most baffling of places: a backwards cap in my seminar this morning. Really? This time of year, Durham is still nippy, just wear a beanie hat instead.

Our desire to be spiritual and different means people wake up, look in the mirror and whack one on. But if it makes you happy go ahead.

I’m just suggesting you find a new way of showing the world you’ve discovered yourself.