Groundwork Season, or How to Prep For Goldrush
ALEX MANSELL on Gold Rush groundwork
Yep, it’s that time of year where all anyone can talk about is deadlines and dissertations. Although the end isn't yet in sight, this doesn't mean your love/lust life has to suffer completely.
For we are now in Groundwork Season, the perfect time to – you got it – lay down the groundwork required for successful Gold Rush action.
First off, the library. THE place to be at the minute, it’s like Lloyds on a Wednesday night, only without the alcohol or fun.
Everyone is there, you’re bound to have awkward moments with past pulls and it’s the perfect place to spot future ones.
The extension, adding 500 more seats, means that you are currently sitting in a building with a higher capacity than any Durham club, meaning you'll be surrounded by a mass of students without the beer goggles and flattering lighting.
Location-wise, let’s face it, the E-Den has the most pent-up sexual energy, with a reputation for being the most shark-infested of library waters.
Level 3 seems to draw an attractive crowd, but with the new East wing in place the distribution could get shaken up.
Now I don’t know if this occurred to anyone else, but the new individual study rooms seem like an ideal place to get it on. Yes, the walls are made of glass, so this is one probably reserved for the more audacious, but kudos to those who do venture there.
Breaks are often the most exciting part of our days at the minute, so make sure you capitalise on this opportunity to socialise.
Often on arranging breaks with a friend, you find they’ll be joined by other mates, thus enabling you to widen your circle of connections and pounce on friends of friends of friends in a few weeks’ time.
The YUM café has excellent potential for spotting and plotting. By this I mean clocking hot guys or girls, and putting them on your To Do List.
However, word on the street is that the East Wing's Level 1 has also provided a new social hotspot; further research will be carried out to ascertain its full potential
I’d like to say don’t be creepy and attempt to find them on Facebook, but far too many people I know are guilty of this, so at least don’t accidently say hi to these randoms.
Speaking of which, large computer screens and the layout of computer rooms mean any Facebook-stalking will be on full view, so do not commit the ultimate self-cock-block and get caught by the target.
The bad news? We are in the term where chat tends to suffer. Nothing of note is going on in anyone’s lives, and overwork and lack of sleep means our minds are turning to sludge.
Making interesting conversation then is much more of an effort. If you find yourself repeating the same lines – “How was your Easter?” “How many summatives do you have?” “Isn’t revision sh*t?” – stop right now.
All of us have had this question at least five times already and it’s hardly going to enamour us to you if we hear it again. Of course, I’m guilty of this, but we need to get a grip and talk something other than exams.
And of course, bear in mind that if you fancy someone on your course, the one thing that links you right now – your subject – has an expiry date.
Now is the perfect time to get some intimate one-on-one revision time with them, and you can’t possibly ask them to help you with this equation or that novel post-exams.
So don’t despair, and think of this not as a horrendous term, but one that can prove propitious for your sex life in the long run. Keep revising and think of Gold Rush…