Pull ‘n’ Go
ALEX MANSELL talks about running into previous conquests
So there you are strolling around Tesco, when suddenly – S**T – there’s the random you pulled at Studio last Saturday.
For many people, fight or flight kicks in and they tend to choose the latter, dashing up aisles, dropping shopping along the way if necessary. And all this to avoid that dreaded moment when your eyes have to meet eyes that were previously inches from your face, and which are now filling with horror.
But why this post pulling fear? Why do we feel the need to pull someone one day and push them away the next? An affliction that affects both guys and girls, I really don’t understand why it has to be so.
When you consider that we’re all at Durham, all 18+, all bright young things, it’s pretty damn ridiculous that we genuinely feel the need to escape; it’s almost a total regression back to childhood in that we quite literally run from a social situation we’re not comfortable with.
Let’s face it, Durham is so small – both geographically and socially – that it’s pretty much impossible not to encounter your pull again. I mean, I’m visiting Durham from my year abroad, and having been here a week I’ve already seen a good few pulls from the past. And having got with someone in Loveshack on Wednesday, I came across him in town the very next day – I’m talking less than 12 hours here, people.
The statistics are against us folks: you’re guaranteed to lock eyes, if not lips, at some point post-pull, so for god’s sake man up, don’t run or hide; give them a smile, a nod, a wave – ANY FORM OF ACKNOWLEDGEMENT WILL DO.
I’m not saying I’ve got commitment issues and demand every guy I’ve got with to give me a song and dance when I see them, but just a nod to the fact that yes, we’ve been in each other’s company before, (albeit in slightly different circumstances) would be nice.
And extra points to anyone who goes that bit further and flashes a cheeky smile or wink that says “Oh hallo, I remember you”.
I’m quite aware that being in a club, wasted, high on dancing, lust and adrenaline, facilitates social conduct and makes being with someone a completely different experience. So yes, when you see them in the light of day there is very much potential for discomfort, but this can be easily avoided if you’re just mature about the situation and laugh it off. If you can have chemistry and excitement with someone one night, why should this be converted into awkwardness the next time you see them?
I really think it shows a weakness of character to not be able to treat someone you get on with the same way regardless of whether it’s day or night, whether you’re drunk or sober. It’s a sign of mutual respect, and, to be honest, it’s just good pulling etiquette.
Obviously, I’m guessing most of us in Durham have had the occasional ‘What was I thinking’ pull, and fair enough, they do require total avoidance. But note that this is the exception, not the rule.
So if you see me around Durham this week, and happened to have pulled me, man up and say hi. Unless I was a ‘What was I thinking’ pull. In this case feel free to run.