20 things you’ve learnt after your fresher year at Cardiff Uni

The Sesh can actually take place any day of the week


As first year draws to an end and our first Uni exams are creeping up, it's always fun to look back on the shits and giggles first year has given you. Before you get here you think you know it all, but we are all undoubtedly shook by the true realities of Uni.

1. So there's this thing called VK…

After your 18th and the many many nights out back home, you think you've tried all the alcohol and you've finally found your fave bev. Scratch that, you've come to the land of VK and if there isn't at least 2 VKs in each hand, expect death stares.

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Wheeey, get your tongue out for the la… vks?

2. Your SU is actually class

Y Plas gives you such feels that you often feel bad for those Cardiff rejects. You think bless, they'll never experience that banging mix of 2009 tunes we all see as an average Wednesday. Just avoid getting off with a rugby boy if you don't want the whole rugby squad to know you the following week.

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Or do it, it is yolo after all…

3. You'll probably never go to all the places you said you would

Revs Tuesday, Soda Wednesdays, Live Lounge on a Thursday and Bingo Lingo with all your flatmates. We've all suggested them, but do we actually make it there? Naaaah. Why not? Because the SU meets all of our needs perfectly – max spend of £4 taxi and 4 VKs for £10. Student paradise.

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Another proud VK owner, cling onto those treasures hun x

4. You probably won't go to all those Societies you fancied in the Fair

Sure, it seemed like fun at first and your mum would tell you it's a great way to make friends. But surprisingly, one 12pm lecture is actually quite tiring and Netflix and chill definitely sounds better than jogging Taly astro with the hockey team.

5. Leaving dishes in your room is probably not a good idea

My fellow Taly South residents will back me up on this. Let's just say it won't be your mum coming to attend to the dirty dishes… (they start with S and rhyme with ish – aka your unwanted pets).

At least beefy Ben enjoys your dirty plates lol

6. Some lectures just don't need your attendance

Let's face it, none of us went to our Thursday 9ams. We were fools to think that would ever happen, SU Wednesdays are just too good to turn down. Silly fresher.

7. Your cupboards will likely be empty 24/7

Uni teaches you that it's ok to starve yourself because you're too lazy to walk to Lidl. I mean, pretty selfish of Lidl to be so far away really. But it's ok, you can make up for the weight loss in 2nd year when it's on your doorstep – Lidl bakery come at me hun.

8. Fattoush is love. Fattoush is life.

Even if you've never been one for munching away after you stumble home drunk, Fattoush change this. Fattoush will call and you better believe you'll answer. Those cheesy chips and garlic mayo have your name written aaalllll over them.

Maybe not for a sober meal…

9. Reading isn't actually that essential for your English degree

That long, extensive reading list for your modules? naaaah, it turns out Shmoop and Spark notes are educational for all ages, even a Uni student. Save yourself that £50 and splash it on the Lash.

10. Everyone is really tall

So you may not have been the tallest in school, but you most definitely weren't the shortest and you could see the person's face when you were speaking to them. Well, those days are gone, get used to looking up majority of the time if you want a conversation with anyone.

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Hello up there!

11. Freshers Week is deceiving

You get to Uni, your flatmates are class, you meet tons of new people, life is good. Only until you're five months in, everyone's pissing you off and you never actually see that girl on your course you met in Pryzm toilets ever again.

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An accurate representation of my social life

12. Uni Halls is basically in another country

You find it strange some people actually have to catch a bus into Uni when you're on your daily stroll to lectures. R.I.P your friendship if one of you is in Uni Halls and the other in Taly, some things just aren't meant to be.

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Image not drawn to scale, ily cathays

13. College Tavern is the place to be

Bored? College Tavern. Stressed? College Tavern. Hungry? College Tavern. For a first year, it's the answer to everything. There's even lager as cheap as £1.99, lifetime membership pls.

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just look at those college tavern smiles

14. Forget that bitchy girl from secondary school, Eduroam is your new enemy

You regret bringing anything to Uni that relies on WI-FI (basically all of your belongings) because eduroam is dogshit and there have been many times you've almost thrown your phone out the window. But stopped yourself every time because you're a poor student who can't afford a new one.

Pardon my french

15. DO NOT SHARE

Sure, sharing a bit of washing up liquid there and a few tea bags here sounds like a good idea at first – but guaranteed, we have all been annoyed at least 158920 times when our shit gets ruined. Bean stains on your cute, patterned tea towel and not seeing a single crumb of the loaf you bought, will drive you over the edge.

16. A sleeping pattern becomes a rare and unusual thing

Guaranteed you will not get a decent night sleep throughout your first year. Not a Monday, Tuesday or even a Thursday, the Sesh can take place any day of the week. Hello ear plugs, my new friends.

17. Deliveroo and UberEats are gifts from God

The dreaded hangover from your beloved Sesh will always be fixed by a guy on a bike. I will never rant at cyclists ever again, such miracle workers. My personal favourite is Wok to Box, absolute 10/10.

18. Drugs are literally everywhere

Everyone does drugs, bit of md here, bit of ket there. Just don't let it slip up in conversation with your mum, you're in a respected University and spend all of your time in the library remember??

Standard deal tbf

19. Your Student Halls box room will forever look like a prison cell

You could hang 20 sets of fairy lights and have 10 cacti, nothing is changing the fact your room is a bare shithole. You realise you've definitely taken the last 18 years of living in a house for granted, roll on 2nd year.

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What a lovely shade of plain…

20. Everyone is from Devon

No matter where you live, what course you're studying or what society you're part of, you are bound to meet someone from Devon. It makes you wonder what goes on in Devon that the entire youth population feel the need to flee? Welcome to the land of normals here in Cardiff.

Second year counts folks, so enjoy Fattoush, unlimited maccas and big tesco whilst it lasts.