The mysterious happenings that will occur in the girls’ club toilet

Such a sacred place

You glance across the sea of sweaty people, you give the girls the signal, they instantly know and you weave your way to the toilets. The safe place where you can escape the loud music and glaring eyes and have that all important gossip.

Woman are known for two things when it comes to toilets and nights out: Attending in packs and taking ages

I’m sure these two things have caused many men to muse over the happenings that go on in the mysterious places that are the women’s toilets on a night out. Here are some of the classic benchmarks of any girls trip to the loos.

Lollipop lady

“No spray no lay”, this lady has banter for days and will amuse drunken you for hours. When you eventually leave the toilets you have as much spray on as a 12-year-old boy who has just got his first can of Lynx. Though the perk is on your stumble home you will find lollipops in the depths of your bag.  Drunk you is great.

They turn up everywhere


There is always someone crying. From happy tears to sobbing over a boy the whole spectrum is covered. Luckily there is always a shoulder to cry on and no tear is left unwiped.

Cry me a river


Life advice is always on plentiful supply in the loos. There will be plenty philosophical epiphanies. In that moment in time you will be convinced something is the best idea you ever had, or you will become the resident agony aunt to half of Cardiff.

Your new BFF

You bond over something small and then become new best friends and in your drunken state your convinced this person is a new life long friend. You add each other on Facebook, then a week later one of their posts appear on Facebook and you are left cluelessly wondering who the hell this person is before remembering your drunken encounter.

Why have we never met before?

Sharing a cubicle

Peeing together is a bench mark in any new friendship and is assumed in any long standing relationship . You no longer give a second glance when you see six girls pile out of a single cubicle.

So many people

The photo shoot

Because let’s face it were else can we pose without being photobombed by some sweaty lad pulling a face ruining the prowess of our photos? After the mad rush which is fake tanning and going through the pain of getting perfectly winged eyeliner, I want to document how hot I look. Not to mention wanting that certain someone to see how hot your looking and what they are missing.


Bonding over make up

“Ooh I have that concealer”, “can I borrow some powder?” –  never underestimate the strong bond that is formed over owning the same make up product or how lending someone some concealer can make someone’s night. As girls we all need to look out for each other – this amazing compassion can be found in the toilets.