I don’t get Beyoncé’s ‘Ivy Park’ clothing line

What’s wrong with Sports Direct?


Beyoncé released her anticipated ‘Ivy Park’ sportswear line today, which is being sold in branches of Topshop, Selfridges and JD Sport across the country.

The hyped brand has been teasing its launch for weeks, which boasts 228 pieces all of which promote a positive body image.  But anticipated as the line may be, can someone please explain what all the fuss is about? Because quite frankly, I don’t get it.

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The brand “mixes high-performance technical styles with fashion-led casualwear” and is supposedly co-founded by Beyoncé herself.  It contains a mixture of leggings, sports bras, t-shirts and jackets all designed with every sporting ability and body shape in mind.

She’s pretty fit yes, but something tells me that she’s no Olympic athlete, and probably knows shit-all about ‘high-performance technical styles’.  In fact, I can easily imagine her hiding behind the word ‘co-founded’, a marketing term to cover up the fact that her personal influence was minimal, her influence being a mere nod of approval as her army of designers held up a plain white t-shirt with the words ‘Ivy Park’ written on the front.

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And what even is Ivy Park?  In the campaign video, the Single Ladies singer does some skipping in the rain (whilst the weather is clearly very sunny) and breathily goes on about disciplines, sacrifices and dreams blah blah blah, but also mentions running in some sort of ‘special’ park.  What’s so special about this park? Aren’t all parks pretty much the same?  Whatever it truly is, it’s a name I don’t need brandished across a t-shirt.

With regards to the collection itself, it looks so plain, oozing dull hues of grey and black, albeit the odd bit of purple here and there.  It may fit every body shape and come in sizes XXS to XL, but is a t-shirt branded ‘Ivy Park’ really going to make you run faster?  Is a pair of leggings with an ‘Ivy Park’ trim really going to make you look like Beyoncé?  It looks boring as fuck, and probably going to make you look basic as fuck, as well as one of those idiots that has succumbed to a celebrity-endorsed product.

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WHAT ARE THOOSEEE

What’s more, just because Beyoncé ‘founded’ it, the prices are hiked up.  Ranging from £8 for a headband, to £160 for some weird mesh coat, who in their right mind (or their wrong mind for that matter) is going to part with £100 for a pair of black leggings, knowing for a fact that each item in the collection has been made for the Bangladeshi equivalent of 50p.  The self-righteous Queen B is making a shit ton of money, and she knows it.

In all fairness, the sportswear does look like proper sportswear and supposedly feels like proper sportswear.  But is a sportswear brand that’s labeled as ‘fashion-led’ really that trustworthy?  Practicality wise, I’m going to say no.  Come on now, what is with those leotards?  What goes to the gym in a leotard?

It’s a brand “inspiring us to stay strong, healthy and happy”, the whole thing looks terribly overrated, and the only thing it’s inspiring me to do is spend my money elsewhere.