Where you buy your pre-drinks says a lot about you

If you bring Grey Goose you’re a chump

A tight budget usually means that most of us source our juice for the evening in Lidl or the local offie.

But one way to show you aren’t strapped for cash is via what you pre-drink with, and more importantly where you got it from.

There is clearly a big difference between a Waitrose shopper and a fellow Lidl customer. One is a dickhead, the other is not.

But other destinations for drink purchasing reveal a lot about your character.

Every little helps


When it comes to price, you can’t beat Tesco Everyday Value Vodka, 70cl for £10. Everyone has resorted to buying it at least once in their life, especially when funds are running low at the end of term. Although you may act like you hate it, it’s always been there when you need it most. Before every night out, you can bet as the clock strikes 10 it’s glued to your hands. No one is judging, it tastes the same as Smirnoff anyway, right?


Mum and Dad’s Alcohol cupboard

I’m talking about the Grey Goose Premium Vodka you nicked from mummy and daddy before returning from summer. You can’t afford it yourself, it’s all for show, so you’re gonna throw a massive pre-drinks and invite everyone on your Facebook friend list, whether you know them or not. Everyone thinks you’re a prick but they’ll take the free house party invite and probably ask if you can get them into the club for free. Apparently when you own a bottle of Grey Goose a little black book gets pushed through your letterbox with the contact information for every promoter in the city. BNOC.

You’re fooling NO ONE


Pre drinking on a  bottle of red wine makes you look pretty sophisticated but you’re not fooling anyone. It doesn’t cost any more than a fiver. It might be kind on your wallet but it won’t be kind to your head. We won’t say “we told you so” when you can’t move from bed unless you’re making a dash to chund in the toilet. We’ll just say good luck in advance.

What a wonderful place

T&A Stores

The best customer service in Cathays, friendly to girls, not so much to guys. A central location to pick up three bottles of Lambrini’s finest on your way to pres. Old habits don’t die-hard, Lambrini was the poison in Year 10 and no matter what anyone says, it still is. You can swig it from the bottle and get all sentimental about how old you’ve got, knowing just like at those Year 10 house parties, you will always end up on the floor in a heap.

No sympathy for the drink stealers

‘I Forgot’

Everyone hates this guy. The one who conveniently forgot to pop to any of the previously mentioned shops. All of which are within close enough walking distance from any pres in Cathays. The one after whatever’s going, creeping around pouring whatever they can find into their cup. Gin, vodka, wine. No wonder you are the drunkest here and we are all very bitter about it. We are not taking you home and putting you to bed and we are definitely not listening to how much of a great night you had because you were so smashed.