Get cookin’ good-lookin’

Feast your eyes on these bad boy recipes & silence your roaring belly by shaking some bacon in the kitchen.

With the boom of foodie photos smothered across Instagram & the twittersphere, the utter despair when you peek inside your desolate uni cupboards is all too familiar.

Yet who has time to whip up some culinary masterpiece that’ll probably end up tasting like crap anyway? Especially when the potential of it making a second appearance after your sixth Bulmers is up there with the big dogs.

These recipes may not win first prize for their beauty but they pack a punch in the taste department. Notoriously easy, scrumptious & your wallet’s new BFF to lighten the blast to your student loan. Perfecto.

Scamper off to the kitchen & knock these babies up…

1. Chicken’ it to tha max


Chop & fry an onion in olive oil until soft. Slice your chicken into strips & whack them into a pan. Let it sizzle until pipin’ hot (food poisoning? Ain’t nobody got time for that!) Pop in some peppers & a handful of mushrooms. Chuck in a fajita spice sachet & some tomato salsa sauce. Stir. Heat your tortilla wraps in the microwave. Sling your mix into a wrap, top with cheese, chunky guacamole or a smothering of BBQ sauce if you’re feelin’ fancy. Devour.

2.  Codfather, herb your enthusiasm


Stale bread? No problem, we can spice it up real nice & eat like a King. Tear up your bread & throw it into a plastic zip bag. Grab any kitchen utensil & bash the hell out of it until it resembles bread crumbs. Throw in some mixed herbs, grated cheese, anything you fancy. Rub your fish with oil & coat it in your herby mix. Bake in the oven at 180°C for roughly 25 minutes until flaky. Serve with garlic bread slathered in a sticky layer of grilled cheese.  Lick the plate clean.

Gotta love some cheeky carb-loading

3.  Sweet baby cheesus, it’s Lady margarita


Crack open a tin of tomatoes & smear onto your pizza base. Be creative & fling on anything: pesto, smoky BBQ, herbs, balsamic glaze. Chop an onion & garlic & sprinkle over your sauce. Throw on some cheese & any other toppings you have lying around. Pop into the oven for 12-15 minutes until golden. Serve with salad & a slurp of beverage.

4.  Don’t take the biscuit


A delightfully naughty treat for surviving fresher’s week! Chuck 125g AP flour, 100g sugar, 85g butter, 1 egg, a pinch of salt & some choc chunks into a bowl. Mix together. Plop dollops of the mix onto a baking sheet & bung in the oven at 170°C.  After 12-15 minutes, you’ll be left with some plump, hunky beasts. Dunk in an icy glass of the white stuff & scoff.