Taking your #ElfOnTheShelf photo: The Ultimate Guide

Show us your best PUNS


It’s no secret that Cambridge students are probably some of the most competitive people in the world, but little do you know that the real competition is only just beginning…

That’s right: The Tab’s NEW #ElfOnTheShelf competition is here demanding your best puns. We want a photo of you in an *adventurous* location accompanied by a badly made pun or rhyme.

As the winner’s image will be our cover image on Facebook for a whole month, you’ll want to bring your best game… so here’s a quick guide to make sure that your entry is the star of the Christmas ball.

Location, location location

Sprinting from one deadline to another, Cambridge students often forget to appreciate the settings around them. #ElfOnTheShelf is here to fix this.

We want you to appreciate the wondrous architecture of your college chapel, to marvel at the beauty of the River Cam, and to gasp at the ornate interiors of your college hall.

Generally, the more outrageous the location, the more impressive the photo. Try visiting College chapels, the Cambridge skyline or the college wine cellars. And don’t forget to take it when no one else is about- photobombs tend to ruin you best puns.

Dip in the cam? (Image credits: Matilda Head)

Furthermore, though nudity might be optional this year, rhyming is not. We are looking for the perfect balance between a sophisticated named location and your punny material.

Embrace tourist activities (Image credits: Vedika Mandapati)

Possible locations could include:

  1. The banks of the Cam
  2. Outside a boathouse
  3. Your supervisor’s office
  4. High table
  5. Trinity fountain
  6. The Law Faculty
  7. Wine cellars
  8. King’s Chapel roof

Nothing says edgy like a view from behind (Image credits: Rosie Smart-Knight)

Composition

At The Tab, we don’t do clumsily put-together photos that belong on your mum’s Facebook page. We are in pursuit of true art. So here’s a few tips:

  • Maximise your landscape: why take a humanities degree when you can look edgy standing as a lone figure with the whole of Cambridge spread out beneath you
  • Get your friends involved: Pose like that awkward family Christmas card. Spell out a letter on the ground. Build a human pyramid. We want to see you get creative.

Photoshopping isn’t allowed but these poses are – have no regrets about the amount of time I spent on this (Image credits: Izzy Porter)

If there was ever a time to spell out something on the ground it’s now (Image credits: Ella Fogg)

  • To face or not to face: In the past, the Tab’s photo competition has required a certain amount of anonymity. However, this year, like many other things, it is up to you. Whilst facing the camera might earn you more fame when you become the Tab’s Facebook cover image, we can’t deny there’s a certain excitement that comes with remaining *mysterious*.
  • Angles people: From above, below, or side to side, we want your best shots.

Time to join the Uni cheer team (Image credits: Bilyana Tomova)

Costume

When creating this competition we pondered whether costume should be compulsory, but alas we thought it better to keep it simple. That being said, you need to dress to impress.

Though Halloween may be over, we want to see your best attempts at fancy dress. Whether you don a Santa garb and pose in front of the granta, cover yourself in Scones outside St John’s or that be an inflatable shark in park-ers piece. Though nudity is no longer required, it is a crime to not illustrate your rhyme.

Costume is everything (Image credits: Geograph via the Creative Commons License )

No costume is complete without accessories and well-chosen props can be an excellent way to convey your rhyme. How about taking some milk down King’s Parade, or proposing with many rings outside Darwin?

Be Make some bold moo-ves (Image credits: George Ellison and Wikimedia Commons via the Creative Commons License)

Rhyming dictionary

We already know that the englings have this one covered. To win #ElfOnTheShelf is to create a rhyme that is made lyrical through its badly put together vocabulary. So whip out your rhyming dictionary (or google) and channel your inner engling.

Here’s a  list of words that could rhyme with Cambridge places: vixen, santa, snowflake, gaviscon, stone, strawberry, buffalo, egg & child.

And finally… what to do if someone sees you

To be honest not a lot we can do to help you with this one if you’re stopped wearing a victorian dressing gown and holding some coins in a fountain. Maybe just explain that it is an art form exploring  the underlying hypocrisies of the polarisation of the humphicification of dynomastery.

The deadline for your entries is November 21st, so it’s time to get into the Bridgemas spirit, get your rhyming caps on straight and get taking those photos. You could be the proud poster child of the Tab with a BNOC status and inflated ego.

Send your submissions to [email protected] by 9:00 pm on November 21st.

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Enter now: Tab Elf on the Shelf competition 2021!

Elf image credits: Public Domain Pictures via the Creative Commons License

Feature Image credits: Rosie Smart-Knight