“Every man dies. Not every man lives”: Your Motivational Survival Guide

BETH SWORDS says stop your feeble-minded moaning and grow a pair. Be inspired.

basketball ben hur Boxing courage Exams mohammed ali motivational pericles War

Quit your complaining. We are here to do a job. It’s hard. It’s boring. But it’s a must.

You don’t have the motivation, you say? The motivation to sit for three hours and write passionately about something you absorbed from schmoop.com, the five minutes before you entered?

Your inspirational routine is clearly lacking.

You are not Martin Luther (King or the Protestant). Your own paltry attempt at a pep talk will not whip you into a frenzy and generate a Nobel-worthy epistle.

What will do this, however, is the perfect balance between Westlife covers, video montages in monochrome and perfectly timed slide transitions.

Here are a series of video clips to watch when you feel nervousness’ sweet grasp tightening around your ribcage.

A 16-year-old version of myself was moved to tears when shown this in the school chaplain’s assembly. Brace yourselves, guys, it’s an emotive one. Indeed, your own father can’t come running into your exams to drag your weary body across the figurative finish line. But, he will be darn disappointed if you do nothing and drop out of the world’s best uni.

That first is not going to arrive in your pidge. Sit there and do nothing and you’ll end up in some job that you had no intention of doing, attempting some menial task with no passion, no desire, no drive (banking?). All because you’ve watched too many YouTube clips instead of working. Sort it out. If metronomic, half-naked, emaciated rowers don’t tell you that, I don’t know what will.

Violins, basketball, tears, sweat, man curled up in the bath. This is a big hitter in the world of inspirational videos. Be great, Cantabrigians. Conquer.

Another chaplain’s assembly, another crying fit. I’m crying watching this now, in fact. For these next few weeks, let your passion be exams.

Finally, you know what you’ve got to do. And now, friend, you must go on your way and do it. To paraphrase Pericles, know your duty and have the courage to accomplish it.

Phewf. Oh my Lord. If you’re not a quivering wreck, filled with a rousing sense of duty, then there is no helping you. Take your apathy and leave.