Cambridge’s Best Bogs

From merry-go-round inspired loos to Cromwell’s chamberpot, GEORGIE WILLIAMS scours Cambridge for the best of the bogs.

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Forget punting, tourists should take a peek at the vast array of lavatories Cambridge has to offer.

While everyone celebrates Cambridge’s academic prowess, our ample supply of loos is often overlooked. No longer! Here are a selection of Cambridge’s finest, so when nature calls, you can find a classy venue to let loose.

Midsummer Common

Affectionately known as the “Armadilloo,” this bizarre Anderson shelter/blimp creation was built in 2005 and features a roof constructed entirely of copper. As part of a council drive to make Cambridge loos greener, which includes solar-powering public toilets on Lammas land and Cherry Hinton High Street, the Midsummer Common block uses rain water to flush the toilets. Pleasingly, they are located on Butt Green.

Oliver Cromwell’s House, Ely

Visit the former home of the the man who transformed the English political system. The man who overthrew the monarchy and turned England into a republican commonwealth. Marvel at his legacy. Piss in his chamber pot. Thanks to the Ely tourist board you can get a insight into Cromwell ’s lav on a tour of the last remaining house of the Lord Protector.

Hotel du Vin & Bistro, Trumpington Street

Whilst it may not look like anything special, this is one classy can. Alas, the camera cannot capture other sensory stimuli this crapper offers: the aroma of Madagascan vanilla; the warm, smooth grain of the wooden finishings; loo roll soft as butter.  But you wouldn’t expect anything less from the French-styled chain voted UK’s best four years in a row now, would you. Really, you could eat your déjeuner off the toilet seat.

Wolfson

Scared of clowns? One Wolfsonian has concocted an effective way to overcome his fear.

Parker’s Piece

By day a boring, stinky public toilet, by night a psychedelic wonder. Built in 2004, the trippy design of Parker’s Piece Toilets was based on a merry-go-round to reflect the use of the common. Floor to ceiling lighting panels around the exterior change colour, lending a somewhat baked feel to your wee experience. There is also a little cafe within the block, which is nice.