Jesus, Can Someone Turn On The Lights?

Jesus students were evacuated from their rooms last night as a power cut plunged the college into darkness.

jesus jesus college porters power cut powercut

Jesus students were evacuated from their rooms last night as a power cut plunged the college into darkness.

The college's power supply cut out at 4.04 pm and by 9.30 residents of two courts were being evacuated into the library where the power had held up.

The black-out disrupted many Jesuans' plans, with one lady fresher complaining that without the use of a shower and her hair straighteners she was prevented from schmoozing with the university's Land Ec elites at Captain's Cocktails.

Second year Nat-Sci Charlie Penney went further: "It's ruined by term. I was planning a heavy night but the bar has closed and I'm not pre-lashing in the dark."

The Porter's Lodge, where the electric clock had stopped at 4.04 (below), was a jovial scene as the men in charge of the evacuation exchanged anecdotes of removing sleeping students from their rooms – although they declined to speak to the The Tab. 

The Jesus Porter's Lodge where the clock had stopped at the time of the power cut.

And one junior member of the Jesus College Student's Union (JCSU) who had been evacuating students told us that some dressing-gown clad couples in the college's notoriously rowdy North Court were curiously slow to answer her knocks.

Instances of students 'riding the horse', a traditional Jesus prank, increased dramatically as the college became pitch black.

The lack of power caused the Old Boys' Rugby dinner to be re-located to Ask on Bridge Street and the owner of the Van of Life compared the increase in Jesuan custom to the feeding of the 5000.

At 10.05 pm the emergency generator kicked in and the packed-out library began to empty down to its normal population.

A third year Theologian, who understandably wished to remain anonymous, stretched the biblical references to breaking point when he told The Tab that "For a few hours the college was without form and darkness was upon the face of Second Court".

And one member of the Rugby team exiled to a restaurant for the evening was equally withering after a few Coronas: "I thought Jesus was supposed to be the light of the world. That obviously isn't true. We can't even light our own college bar."