To Slut or Not: The Fancy Dress Debate
We tackle the trials and tribulations of the classic fancy dress costume conundrum: does one slut it up or go mad?
It’s the age-old question which has baffled philosophers for years: I’m reliably informed that Nietzsche barely slept for the last few years of his life, he was so torn by the issue. I’m talking, of course, about the fancy dress debate. Namely, whether to go as a sexy bunny or as the full-blown ostrich complete with stilts, beak and the ability to lay giant eggs (commitment is key when approaching the fancy dress conundrum). So to aid you in your decision making, here’s the angles to go for:
There is a lot to be said for doing it this way. You will get drinks bought for you, enjoy the experience of actually attracting the opposite sex, and won’t have to resort to being the funny girl who writes articles for The Tab (although surely this would improve your pulling power to the nth degree)? However, isn’t going out shirtless, dressed in lingerie, or wearing only body paint ever-so-slightly embarrassing? I guess it has to do with the type of person you are: if you are going to wear the cat-suit, you must have the attitude to match. On being asked by your swap partner if you are enjoying your course you can’t answer with an in-depth discussion about whether Byron had a clubfoot or if it was just mild cerebral palsy. You have to pull off a coy smile and some kind of innuendo (something to do with “inter-course”, perhaps)?
If this is your choice try to avoid all shiny surfaces (I was horribly scared by accidently catching sight of myself in the back of a spoon the other day). The fun of fancy dress surely lies in the money wasted and hours spent trying to mix the elusive ‘alien’ shade of body paint (green, blue, a dash of silver and white is the Tab recipe for the perfect pigment). Plus imaginative use of the theme and slightly off-course costumes always provoke questions. The only issue is if you can’t actually answer the questions because you are wearing a helmet made of clingfilm. Moderation may be key in other walks of life, but re swap fancy dress, get your mates together and go MENTAL. Total commitment will earn you the respect of your peers and set the bar high for the next swap/bop/Saturday night.
And before I hear you cry, “but wait, this article has nothing to do with fashion!” I propose that fashion trends are like fancy dress themes. Designers get their inspiration from nature, architecture, music, popular culture. We get our themes for swaps from movies, whatever is on special offer in Sainsbury’s and that theme that we saw Trinity doing last week in Cindies which looked fun. Cast your mind back to summer and you will remember, I am sure, pandemic fancy dress: people dressed up as sailors in the nautical theme; as nature in floral print dresses or as the celebrity du jour. After all, isn’t all fashion a bit of a dress up?
Anyway, if you’re still in doubt about your fancy dress style, flick back through your facebook photos. If the comments include those little hearts and the word “fit”, you are a sexy; if they include “wtf?” and “What are you dressed as?” then you are an inventive.
Either way, it’s your style, embrace it.