Where Do You Date…?

BAYAN PARVIZI reviews the best places to take someone way out of your league.

Dating Fez Gardies Parvizi Rainbow Vaults

When you're punching above your weight, where do you date?

We’ve all been there. Somehow, whether it was those catechism classes, visits to the nursing home for your Duke of Edinburgh Gold Award, or your £2 per month to Geoff your polar bear, you’ve bagged a date with a hottie, with whom you would ordinarily be a nottie. How have you deserved such ethereal grace? Cosmic alignment? Is she blind? Put those thoughts aside and be lucrative. How did that old oil baron bag Anna Nicole Smith? Bespectacled Arthur Miller Marilyn Monroe? Any premiership footballer any WAG? Who cares, enjoy divine providence. Nonetheless to preserve such heavenly luck follow the guide to a perfect date and prove the existence of an Almighty to those skeptics.

Journalists and Actors
You met her, she was dazzling and somehow interested in what you had to say. “Oh so you write for…?” Who cares if she’s networking, go for it. “I loved your article on the political situation in Sidney Sussex.” Invite for drinks at ArtsPictureHouse bar on Regent St. It’s not too far from the centre of town and far more original than the ADC. If you’re taking things slowly then invite her along to the café at the Fitzwilliam Museum, both venues offer potential to continue the date into evening if your stars are aligned. For those who want a more retro option there’s always the CB2 café near Anglia Ruskin. Go on show your more egalitarian side. If things go to plan take her onto Trinity Vaults near Strada on Trinity St, which does fantastic two for £6 cocktail offers and is slightly more adventurous than The Cow or Ta Bouche.

Sportsmen and Drinking Society members

So you dazzled them with your fencing skills and your ability to strawpedo a VK Blue, but how do you take it further than a Blues tie and drunken pull at The Place?  Show your sensitive side at the Rainbow Café on Kings Parade to that fit American yet vegan exchange student, swallow your tofu quiche whilst thinking of England. If you’ve somehow bagged that timeless beauty, whom you have to share with JC; help your sexual negotiating skills with a lunch at Michaelhouse Café opposite Caius, a working church that serves fantastic homemade food for lunch and breakfast. If you’ve managed to navigate around veganism, religion and your inferior looks and she’s keen for a night out, whisk her to the B Bar opposite Fez. This bar has a great terrace for those summer nights, and is primed for taking the night further at Fez. To seal the deal, whilst also providing nourishment and culinary ingenuity forgo Gardies, The Vans and instead take a romantic walk to Mill Road and Fagitos, home of the best chips in Cambridge.

Whether it’s B Bar, Fagitos or the ArtsPictureHouse bar, make the most of the run-up to Valentine’s Day, and make the most of these red-letter dates that rarely occur outside the confines of our fair university.