Oxford JCR Renamed Gryffindor

Students at the Other Place have caused a crisis by voting to rename Magdalen College JCR “Gryffindor.”

Students at the Other Place have caused a crisis by voting to rename Magdalen College JCR “Gryffindor.”

The motion to rechristen in honour of Harry Potter’s house at Hogwarts was passed this Sunday, at a general meeting of the Oxford College’s JCR.

Just six votes were cast in opposition to the curious proposal.

The initiative means that Magdalen JCR must be referred to Gryffindor in all official documents, although the proposition does not extend to renaming the College itself.

‘Gryffindor’ JCR President Laurence Mills is now obliged to write to three other Oxford Colleges, suggesting they change their names to the remaining Hogwarts houses.

He must also pen a letter to the President of College, recommending that he change his name to Dumbledore, and purchase a fully functional sorting hat.

The College is the only one in Oxford to have its own deer park.

1st year Politics, Philosophy and Economics student at Magdalen, Callum Adams-Carr told The Tab, “We were all voting yes as a joke, assuming there’d be fail safes, and now it turns out there aren’t, at least until next term. Oops.”

The motion was suggested by 3rd year Zoe Tyndall, “when drunk”, Adams-Carr explained. Tyndall’s other extracurricular activities include writing College ‘gossip rag’ and launching a bid to be elected as one of Oxford University Student Union’s NUS delegates.

This is the first time in Magdalen’s 550 year history that the JCR has been rechristened. However, the rename certainly proves claims on the College website that Magdalen has a “modern and progressive outlook.”

The story has already hit national press, though the amendment to the college’s Wikipedia entry made by Magdalen undergraduates was “taken down sharpish” according to Adams-Carr.

“The tutors are probably trying to hush it up”, he said.

However, student reactions to the name change were much more positive.

First-year Suzie Harrogate commented that she was “quite ecstatic about the whole situation” as she had “always wanted to go to Hogwarts.”

Third-year Daniel Waters informatively said, “I’d like to put my basilisk in your chamber of secrets.”

 

CAMBRIDGE HOGWARTS COLLEGES

 

John’s: Slytherin ‘Slytherin house values ambition, cunning, leadership and resourcefulness.’

Jesus: Gryffindor. ‘Gryffindor values courage, bravery, daring, nerve and chivalry.’ Enough said.

Pembroke: Hufflepuff. Hufflepuff values hard work, loyalty, tolerance, and fair play

Homerton: Ravenclaw – it’s just a bit shit really. Wikipedia claims that Ravenclaw values intelligence, but that might have to be looked over in this case.

 

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