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Every reason why you shouldn’t visit home too often while at uni

It’s lame, do your own washing


You're a uni student now, long gone are the days when you didn't have to cook, clean, and pay the bills. Going home for the weekend always seems like a good idea, mainly because you get to see your dogs, but we're here to tell you that you've got to stop.

The journey home is not even really worth it

Whether you get the train, bus, or drive, it always takes you forever to get home. You end up spending more time with your High School Musical playlist than your mum. Especially if you went out the night before, those drives are the worst. And no, taking a nap on the bus does not help your hangover.

You actually cannot bear family life anymore

You're living in your own selfish independent world now, far away from Mum's house rules. Dinner at 6pm, siblings, curfews, chores, ew. You aren't used to the weird shit your siblings do anymore and you get woken up before 9am by them going to school. You haven't seen that time in a while and it's painful, don't do it to yourself.

who's horse is this?

Going out is a real mission

Smuggling your drunk self back into the family home after a night on the sesh may as well be Mission Impossible. The soft closing of the front door that you had once mastered is long gone. You're used to the slamming of those cheap halls doors now, throwing up strategically into your en-suite as you make your way to bed. Home is full of obstacles, it's too risky and so not worth the lecture from your mum in the morning.

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You can't just eat what you want when you want

Bye bye ice cream for dinner and welcome back parsnip soup. Same for waking up at 3am to eat cheese. If you think your mother will let you buy and eat whatever you want, whenever you want, you're wrong. You will eat everything on your plate, as if your life depends on it.

You have to hide your drunken souvenirs

Foundation won't hide that huge hickey on your neck, and explaining that to your parents will top your list of most disturbing conversations of all time. And that infinity sign tattoo on your ankle has put you on a one way train to lecture city.

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"No mum, that is not a love-bite, I tripped and fell"

Your parents are not like your housemates

You can't bring your catch of the night home with you. The walls may be just as thin as the ones in Clive Booth, but your parents will not high-five and congratulate you at breakfast the next day.

Everyone back home seems so boring

After finding such amazing people at uni, going home to your GCSE mates is a bit like pouring a bowl of cereal and then realising you don't have any milk.

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don't mind me, the alcoholic, having fun on her own

You always receive a comprehensive interrogation from your extended family

If it isn't about the boyfriend you don't have, it is about the studies you're failing. Lying is mostly easier, just tell them you "love to study at the library on Sundays with your boyfriend Ryan Gosling".

Forget about pre-drinks

No, you can't play ring of fire with your dad, so it's a classic pre-game at 'Spoons for you. Good luck mate.