The best stories from Freshers’ Week 2016

“I saw three people throwing up in the middle of the foam party. I don’t think anyone noticed.”


Freshers’ Week has come once again, and with it drunken tales you probably won’t tell your parents.

We’ve gathered some of the best stories from this year’s Freshers’ Fair so you can judge others anonymously.

Ellena, first year, Psychology and Education

“I was walking home after the O2 and we saw a group of drunk people in Clive heading home. One of them walked up to their door, but couldn’t work the key, and just sort of collapsed against the door and fell asleep.”

Steph, second year, Fine Art

“I hit someone on the head with a bin!”

Dan, second year, BioMed

“I saw a girl having to be physically manhandled off the U1 in town because she was so out of it.”

Francis, second year, BioMed

“I woke up at 5:30am to a stranger screaming in my backyard.”

Sian, Masters, Law

“I saw a fresher shit themselves on the club floor then keep dancing. It was gross.”

Ryan, third year, Primary Education

“It was a friend’s birthday during Freshers’, and he got lashed on vodka at pres. On the bus into town he passed out leaning against the chair in front, and managed to relax so much he got his head stuck between the chair and the window. We couldn’t get him out for five minutes.”

Mike, second year, Music

“We all got pretty smashed at pres, but my mate George ended up wandering down to Abingdon by himself. Some Oxford girls found him covered in scratches because he apparently fell in a bush, and he ended up with the police.”

Luke, second year, BioMed

“A guy stole a wheelie bin from one of his neighbours on James Street and was just pushing and throwing it up and down the road.”

 Keiran, second year, BioMed

“One of my flatmates wet the bed on the first night of Freshers’. What was worse was that he was sharing the bed with another guy at the same time.”

Mark, second year, Biology

“I saw three people throwing up in the middle of the foam party. I don’t think anyone noticed.”