Movendber

Yesterday was the first day of December, a day when Christians feast, a day when children open the first door of their advent calendars, and a day when girlfriends breathe a sigh of as their boyfriends’ moustaches are removed.

A terrible tash

Personally Movember has not been kind to me. I was asked to write regular updates for the Brookes Tab, but how can you write updates on things that are not changing?

A more impressive effort

Raising money for charity, in my opinion, requires you to partake in an act that is to your detriment either physically or emotionally. Movember has caused me both physical and emotional pain. My top lip hurts from the pressure I have been putting it under and I have spent the last month incredibly self-conscious of the embarrassing child-like tash residing on my face.

For some people, Movember has been excellent. Men with marvellous mos strut around, receiving the admiration of women and the jealousy of men. I am no such man. But I feel proud because I have earned my sponsorships.

The classiest of moustaches

I have tried everything to grow my mo. I read that Vitamin E improves blood-flow and boosts hair growth. I’ve been munching mangos and scoffing spinach like a man possessed. It has had no effect.

As far as my mango-mo went

I would like to offer my congratulations to those who managed to nurture their facial hair into a respectable shape, especially The Brookes Bulls Rugby League Team who raised nearly £800 for the cause.

Maybe next year will be my year, but probably not.

For all things Brookes facial-hair and more like The Brookes Tab on Facebook.