Screaming bloody murder: students protest at careers event

Students stage dramatic mass slaughter in protest against BAE Systems


There was chaos at a university careers event yesterday, as bloodied students enacted a massacre on the floors of the Wills Building to protest against the presence of “dealers in death”.

Smeared in fake blood, the campaigners, who object to arms companies BAE Systems, Thales and EADS on account of their “hideous corruption”, staged a shrieking ‘die in’ in front of the bemused staff of the BAE stall at the Engineering Careers Fair.


After letting out screams and collapsing onto the ground, the group, who describe themselves as “Bristol students against the arms trade”, were quickly escorted from the Great Hall by university security.

The students were immediately ordered to identify themselves, with security threatening to arrest those who questioned the decision. It was explained that students wouldn’t be in trouble as long as no synthetic blood was found on the floor of the hall.

The Tab was then ordered to delete all photos featuring identifiable, or unidentifiable security staff, on the grounds of it being “against the law of the university”.

Of the ‘die-in’, one protestor, who gave his name as 20th century anarchist Alexander Berkman, told The Tab, “BAE Systems, Thales and EADS are all hideously corrupt.

“On a moral level, I object to companies that deal in death. One friend came across an internship which centred on ‘improving lethality’. It’s evil.”

Not all the attendees were of the view that the protest was worthwhile.

One Engineering student said: “Well, they’re all Arts students so we don’t take them seriously. They’re not going to be considering careers with BAE Systems, are they?”