Sandwiches, Smiths And Suspicious Chairs

The Tab looks back on a mad and unfortunately alcohol-free AMM 2013


It may have been billed as an afternoon of boring politics, but there was enough madness in today’s AMM to keep even the most apathetic student entertained.

If you were unfortunate enough to miss it (and honestly where were you?) here’s a quick recap of all the important stuff you missed.

The Hiatt Baker Walkout

First on the list of motions was a proposal to cut rent for Hiatt Baker students who’ve had to put up with disruption from building work. Sensing an opportunity to save money, the hall was packed with Hiatt Baker students eager to vote the proposal through.

Not all Hiatt Baker students did a great job of explaining why they have it so tough. One girl in particular complained her chair kept vibrating, prompting many in the room to ask ‘how can I get one of those?’ On the whole, however, their case was sound and comfortably passed.

Once there motion was finished however, they all left, with 20 other proposals still to be discussed. As a result the room was barely left with enough students for any official decisions to be made. A true triumph for democracy.

Don’t let the door hit you on the way out

Unsurprisingly, the tactics of Hiatt Baker students were roundly condemned by many.

The Missing Sandwich

Chaos struck the AMM when over an hour in UBU President Paul Charlton lost his sandwich. Quickly overshadowing the discussion on stage, the search for the sandwich was all anyone on Twitter could talk about.

Thankfully, the sandwich was swiftly rescued and returned to its owner. The only remaining mystery is what fillings Paul had gone for.

Fit Watch

We told you earlier today to expect sexual tension at the AMM but my God we didn’t expect it to get quite so steamy!

We’re not quite sure if VP Hannah Pollak was hunk-hunting or not but if she was it seems there were plenty of options.

Even Bristol’s student journalists were making eyes at each other.

The biggest catch in the room though appears to have been VP Tom Flynn, who is now officially the Sabb most students would prefer to be stuck in a lift with.

An Appearance From Morrissey

Unfortunately, Morrissey couldn’t make it to the AMM in person but he was definitely there in spirit, with the motion for meat-free Mondays getting the thumbs up.

The decision provoked widespread derision and outrage from many online, until it was pointed out to them it’s their own fault for not turning up and voting.

Meat Is Murder: Morrissey will be pleased
Photo: Man Alive! (Flickr)

Gimmick Tweets

With UBU choosing which tweets made it onto the screen in the hall, competition was fierce to provide the best AMM-related joke. Some took it a step further though and registered gimmick accounts.

Not all took off (here’s looking at you SpottedInTheAMM) but the resounding victor in ‘being hilarious’ was definitely Stupid Union Motions, an account dedicated to suggesting such brilliant ideas as ‘banning the use of paper on campus’.

We’ve listed our favourite Stupid Motions below, vote for your favourite and, who knows, maybe this time next year it will find its way onto the actual agenda!