Confessions: UWE Two Good At Being Bad

Two days in, and UWE are way ahead of their city rivals in the Battle Of The Confessions. Yesterday’s result saw UWE win with a resounding 79% of the vote.

Are UWE students just better at coming up with shameful, disgusting confessions? Is this a sign that the Rah’s and Posho’s of Bristol are actually all rather dull?

You know the rules by now. Two confessions, one winner. Voting closes midday tomorrow with the winner announced on Twitter.

Today’s theme: The Al Fresco Nasty

One Drink The Bar day, as it was officially known then, a friend bumped into a long term fuck buddy (at least 3 weeks).

Realising it was a long walk home they decided to try their luck in the upper hallway of the Students’ Union building. One blow job and a quickie later they realise the long suffering security blokes from red bar had got their porn fix for the evening!

Red faces all around!

After another unimpressive night at Lounge last year, we decided to call it pretty early. Walked out around 1, the boys all got a cab back to halls, but I stayed around to pay Jason Don a visit as my house was only 5 mins away.

In the process of ordering my chicken burger mayo ketchup, I got talking to a second year called Sarah (solid 7). Sarah had been at Lounge too but wasn’t drunk enough, so had left her friends at the club and was about to walk home by herself. Of course as the gent I truly am, I offered to walk her back. She said she doesn’t normally do this but she’d rather go back to mine. As you can imagine, I didn’t really give a fuck… from that moment on I thought I knew how this night was gonna end.

Walking up Queen’s Road towards Pembroke, she mumbled something about heels, said she couldn’t be bothered to walk anymore, leaned up against the wall and within about 30 seconds we were f*cking in the middle of the street!! We kept going til a police car drove by, didn’t want to be bait so crossed the road into an alleyway behind a couple bins and went at it again. Still not quite believing my luck, I took her to mine, went for round 2, slept like a baby.

The next morning she went home, I never called her, she never called me, but I will always remember her as the girl who gave it up on the pavement to save herself the walk home. A true ladette if I ever saw one.

SU screw or roadside rogering? Vote now!