Every problem you’ll have living in your second year Newcastle house
The Jesmond residents will probably hate you
So, you’ve moved out of Leazes if you’re “rah” and Ricky Road if you’re alright – here’s every problem you’ll encounter in your second year house.
You always bump into the person you got with last week
There are just so many places it can happen. Walking down Ozzy Road, waiting for a cash machine, or more commonly – the reduced section in Tesco (because you spent all your money that week buying them a blueberry treble). One of the worst places is on the Metro platform – the awkward eye contact is unbearable, and waiting seven minutes for the next train feels like an hour.
Finding damp in your house on Sunbury
Houses can get pretty damp, and no wonder when you haven’t turned on the heating for two days to save money – so your damp washing is hanging out to dry. But no houses are more damp than those on Sunbury Avenue. Those pesky tall Victorian terraced houses, the seven or eight beds can be a damp trap.
Realising you spend £30 a month on Metro
You thought living in Jesmond was supposed to be cheaper than living in town. Well, not quite. That ‘walk-to-uni’ club you had planned with your course mates never quite materialises. You find yourself far too tempted to roll out of bed and jump on the Metro with 15 minutes until your seminar starts. It does mean you can be nice and warm on your way in, but those tickets do add up.
And you’ll probably get fined at least once
It’s always that time when you think “Oh, it will be fine. They never have the barriers up.” Your heart sinks as you ride up the escalator to greet a fluorescent-coated, smug Geordie asking you where your ticket has got to. That’s £20 down the drain – the equivalent of a night out. Book a taxi next time.
Getting ripped off by the three supermarkets in Jesmond
Tesco is expensive and shopping at Waitrose is daylight robbery. £1.50 for an avocado? As for Sainsbury’s, you probably blow at least a tenner a week on “cheeky sandwiches” as you hop off the Metro. Why can’t we have an Aldi like every other city in the country?
When you realise Manor House Road isn’t what it’s cracked up to be
Last year everyone told you it was the “party capital.” But to be honest, there’s more action in an old people’s home than on MHR.
Waking up to the sound of the bottle bins being emptied up and down Osborne Road
Unlucky if your bedroom window backs onto Osborne Road. It feels like they always empty the bins one bottle at a time so you’re kept awake for an hour.
The Jesmond residents will hate you
As an older resident, choosing to live in Jesmond probably wasn’t the best idea. It’s not our fault we like to party. Landing yourself next door to an old lady can be quite frustrating, particularly if she’s not into Stormzy like your bass speakers tell her you are. It only takes a couple of late night complaints to be put straight on the police watch list. If Barbara’s book group meeting is the reason you can’t host a massive pre-drinks, it can be really annoying.
If you’re living in Sandyford you probably have a mansion but you’re an hour away from everything and everyone
Sandyford is great for saving extra cash, but what can you spend it on? A lot of it will probably go on a bus pass so that you can actually get to uni.
Having to walk past all the bars to get home from the library
This can be torture. Seeing gaggles of students lapping up happy hour at Bar Blanc, whilst you stroll past with a bag full of heavy books fresh from the Robbo’s shelves is a nightmare. The worst part is, in the five hours you were there refreshing your Facebook newsfeed repeatedly, you should have been reading them. Early night for you, back in tomorrow.