This is what your road in Winton says about you

If you’re a current student resident of Winton, I’m sorry

With a bustling, vibrant and chaotic high street accommodating 11,000, Winton, a “suburb” of Bournemouth as described by Wikipedia, is set on the town’s longest road, Wimborne.

Winton is the most popular area for Bournemouth’s students to live in with attractive qualities such as three buses at once or none for 40 minutes, a spoons without a fryer (consequently noticeably less tasty chips), and the Wild West of Winton has a tumbleweed equivalent of flying rubbish from coastal winds swirling around the pavements. But did you know that what road you live in on Winton actually speaks volumes about who you are as a person? This is what your road in Winton says about you:

Cardigan Road

Everyone knows someone who lives on Cardigan road. None of us are sure why but you probably study something in communications as you know how to network and you were organised enough to get yourself a house on one of the most popular roads in Winton before the masses descended.

Alma Road

Depending on which end of the road you sit on you’ve either made the best decision of your uni years, aside from choosing to study at Bournemouth, or a lesson in research. The sheer enormity of this road only broken by the off licences and borderline illegal parking is what bridges the gap with Charminster, another popular student area, which is what some BU students have branded as “the real political divide”. If you made the correct decision you’ve bagged yourself a £2.50 double from Buffalo, £5 pizza hut flatbread and drunken commute in a three minute vicinity. If you’ve made the wrong decision the drunken commute will have you sobered up and high fiving morning runners by the time you’ve made it home.

Talbot Road

Are you a cheerleader, shop exclusively at Zara, or are partial to a skinny caramel iced double shot latte? Perhaps you get the badge in, wear Sauvage, and could’ve gone pro if you hadn’t injured your knee? Talbot is the road for you if you answered yes to any of the above. It’s hard to imagine a more basic road, but basic doesn’t mean bad! Just prepared to be judged by every student side-eyeing your Corsas and Fiat 500s as they trudge to 9ams.

Columbia Road

You probably don’t study geography, because do you even know where Winton is? If it makes you feel any better, you’re probably paying the same amount of rent as people closer to the centre (and fun) of Winton, and you’re no closer to Talbot campus. If you were planning on ever saving to own a property you may want to rethink living on this road, as your closest shop is the Co-op and it feels like a marathon distance to get to Lidl situated in the-land-of-not-£5-cheese.

Ripon Road

Did you choose to live on this road because it sounds cool? Because I would probably do the same. Otherwise it’s hard to see why you’d choose a road on the farther side from uni, but then again who comes to university to study right?

Frederica, Sedgeley, Stanfield and Osborne Road

You’re super indecisive, and it has to be agonising. You’re equal distance between AUB and BU and Winton but also without the benefit of being near a good bus stop. You’re also all the same person.

Glenmoor Road

It would actually be impressive if you managed to be late to a lecture living this close to uni. Please book an appointment with student support to address your timekeeping issues, or lay off the Buffalo brews, yeah?

Related articles recommended by this author:

• Which Bournemouth icon should be the next prime minister?

• 10 things you only know if you’ve ever lived in an all girls uni flat

• A definitive ranking of the best places to study on Bournemouth University campus