Admit it: You secretly hate your housemates

From stealing your last drop of milk in a morning to abandoning their dirty boxers in the bathroom, house sharing is a complete nightmare.

You tell your housemates you love them to their face, but curse the day they were born behind their back. Why do you let your fridge shelf become covered in mould? Why do you never wash?

You might be reading this with your housemates, denying it all. You’re asking each other “do I do it?”, and “is it really true?” – and because most of us are overly polite people, we’ll reply “no, not at all, I love living with you!” Now is the time to come clean. We know you’re lying, and you know you’re lying.

Apparently the bathroom window sill is the best place for dirty boxers

It’s time to stand up and say “stop playing your trumpet at 2am”, “use the toilet brush to clean off your shit” and “I can’t take it anymore, you have to stop leaving your toe nails on the sofa”. Stop leaving your dishes soaking for days, we know you won’t get around to it. Don’t even try to say you’ll change the bins when we all know you’ll take it out, leave it on the kitchen floor, and never replace the bin bag.

But you can’t just point the finger and pass on the blame. Not only are you lying about your housemates’ annoying habits, you’re lying to yourself about your own. We believe we couldn’t possibly be one of the culprits, and we also generally agree the other sex is worse to live with than our own.

We like to think we are the perfect person to live with, everything clean and exactly how you like it. Well girls, we’re all guilty of hair in the shower plug, and we have enough random belongings splurging out of various handbags to cover the whole house. Guys, you don’t get off lightly either. Why do you think the kitchen counter is a great place to put your sweaty football kit? And no, not everyone wants to watch football all day long.

These swimming trunks have been on the bathroom floor for days

Pete Sampson, you’ve been named and shamed

No matter how “chill” your housemates are, and no matter how much they reassure you they’ll do it later, they aren’t and they won’t. We all know even if you’re living with your BFFL, there’s always something that really rubs you up the wrong way, and you’ll hate them.