How I survived a phoneless week

No, I didn’t lose it in Gatecrasher

birmingham challenge drunk text funny iphone night out phone social media student stupid tuesdays

As a self-confessed phone and social media addict, I was challenged to survive without it for one hellish week.

To make the task more ridiculous and inconvenient than it already was, I decided to abstain from all my favourite social media sites, such as Facebook, Twitter and my dearly beloved Instagram feed.

Phone-ception

Day One: Monday

Mixed emotions. Many obstacles. Much stress.

My housemate Rachel became a human alarm clock as it occured to me while getting into bed Sunday night, that one of the reason’s I hate my phone is because it wakes me up in the morning.

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On a monday I was already contemplating faking my own death to stay in bed

Not only did I have an actual person shaking me awake, which most will agree, is fucking terrifying, but I couldn’t even press snooze and enjoy another 10 minutes of that blissful sleepy morning feeling.

Day Two: (Stupid) Tuesday 

Thats right, I made an executive decision to brave a night out with my mates at the infamous Players. And it was bloody brilliant.

When I’m trollied, the last thing I want to do is attempt to form a text to meet up with friends, or try to get in contact with that one annoying, wandering mate that sees a night out as a chance to explore Birmingham alone.

No phone? Not my problem. I was free to enjoy my night throwing shapes and expressing myself through the medium of interpretive dance.

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Even MI5 couldn’t decipher this text 

However, it did occur to me that not taking your phone on a night out is an admittedly dumb decision.

Imagine if I’d lost my mates and was being cornered by a middle aged leech in VIP, or got lost and couldn’t even call a taxi home.

Scary thought.

Day Three: Wednesday

I had a long hungover day on campus planned, and I was actually beginning to feel a weird sense of freedom (along with a mixture of shame and regret).

I wasn’t constantly checking my pocket or bag to ensure my most prized possession was still there.

I wasn’t panicking hearing any noise that remotely sounded like my phone dropping out of my pocket.

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Bitches wanna be me

Breezing through my day, I avoided distractions with the blissful knowledge that my phone was stored safely away in a drawer at home.

Day Four: Thursday

I found out I had a week to organise and plan a presentation with four random people from my seminar group.

It loomed on me the amount of effort this is via the archaic mode of e-mail. So I e-mailed my group lamely asking them to add me on Facebook – a Facebook to which I couldn’t access – and hoped for the best.

Not being able to text, ring or even Facebook message someone is starting to become a serious problem. The sheer convenience of a smartphone is, when you think about it, pretty mind-blowing.

Is social media really that sociable?

But the lack of online communication resulted in a lot more actual talking. I wasn’t relentlessly tapping through a 103 second snapchat story whilst mid conversation.

I wasn’t checking my texts for an “instant” message that required an instant reply.

Day Five/Six: The Weekend

So many missed Instagram opportunities. I travelled home to see friends and couldn’t even upload a selfie-stick-selfie to mark the occasion.

Stuffing my face with my local pub grub, I realised I hadn’t even snapchatted a picture of my glorious meal accompanied by several love heart emojis.

Who says you can’t document your eating habits over social media? Haters. Thats who.

And I missed the chance to upload a golden teapot-pose picture of my night out on tuesday, proving that I’m a party animal who doesn’t actually prefer to stay in most nights watching The Big Bang Theory repeats.

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proof I actually have mates

Day Seven: Sunday

Much to my delight my phone was returned to me, and it was a bit of an anti-climax.

Although grateful to be able to lie in bed and mindlessly scroll through Instagram, my day got more unproductive the more time I spent judging pictures of Kylie Jenner’s awful hair extensions.

I’d had a really good week, done lots of fun things and although I couldn’t share them on Facebook for the likes – I’m not really that bothered at all.

The chore of checking my phone every 5 minutes was back, along with my social media addiction.

And it made me think – dramatic pause…

Is the smartphone really a blessing, or a burden?