Everything that will happen at Thompsons, not that you’ll remember it

Thompsons is one of Belfast’s most historic clubs, and for good reason. It’s been a pillar in Belfast’s dance scene from the beginning. And no matter when you go, you’ll always leave with something. A new experience, a new story, a new friend or potentially a venereal disease and a bad comedown. Thompson’s is the sort of place where it could go either way. If you’ve never been there before get ready to pleasure and pain cycle that is a night at Thompsons. If you’ve been saying “never again” every Tuesday and Saturday for the past few years I bet you’ll recognise some of the things on this list.

You will be surprised that it’s actually down an alley

Yeah, you definitely would’t walk down it if there wasn’t a club there.

You will get more smashed than you have ever been in your life

Someone will recommend a double vodka and WKD and you will never look back… until the next morning when you regret everything.

Someone will get hit on the head by a drink

Thompsons two floor balcony style setup means that a least a couple of times a night, someone will be hit on the head by a drink. If they’re lucky, it’s a double vodka Red Bull in a plastic cup, if not, it will be a bottle of wine. Thankfully though, the upstairs floor isn’t high enough for it to ever smash.

You will have a twenty minute conversation with the toilet guy

Don’t expect a free lolly though.

You will unsuccessfully try and negotiate a better entry fee with the bouncers

It is dear for a student.

You will spend 90 per cent of your night in the smoking area

It’s the only place with what could be described as fresh air. After a couple of hours in the pill sweat mist of the dancefloor you’ll need a feg to keep it all together.

You will consistently be surprised by the banger after banger the DJ plays

Thompsons’ DJs are always at the top of their game. From worldwide heavy hitters to local legends, even if you hate Thompsons as a club, you can never deny they can play.

You will leave something or someone behind

It comes with the messy teritory.

You will wonder how long it’s been since they mopped the floor

Thompson’s floors will always reach physically impossible levels of stickiness. Don’t wear suede shoes.

The dress code

There definitely fucking isn’t one.

3am will come too early

It always does and it always will

And when you blow your nose the next day, it’ll probably look like this

Fear the drip