Vote for Belfast’s worst night out

We’ve brought you reasons to love the Limelight, inevitable stages of a night out in Union, and how to keep the craic 90 in Box – But let’s be honest, it’s easier to find reasons to complain about clubs than to compliment them.

With that in mind, we’ve put together a vote: we want to hear your views on the best of the worst.

It might be because of the bouncers, it might be prices, it might be because of that one night you had one too many and were sick on yourself in the toilets.

Whatever the reason, we’ve all cringed remembering our worst nights out, and our memories of the clubs we’ve had them in are tarnished in the process. That might be your reason for voting for one of the following as your Worst Student Night Out.

Or maybe you just think they’re a bit shit.

1. Union

The right of passage for every Queen’s fresher is Connected Mondays, where the drinks are cheap and the bouncers think law students know everything.

The problem with union nights out is that Mandela feels a lot like a labyrinth of underground rooms and if you’re unfamiliar with the layout or completely blocked it’s impossible to navigate in pitch black. Much like the caves level on Goldeneye.

If you lose your friends you might as well give up and go home, you’re not gonna find them again.

2. Box

If you can bothered to make it all the way over to Odyssey, there’s no other place to be than Box. The problem is just that, it’s So. Far. Away from everywhere else, and when all you want is to stumble into Gucci Chip on your way home, having a drunken cry with the SOS volunteers outside just isn’t going to cut it.

3. The Parlour

The cosy interior is cool until you’re really drunk on those cheap cocktails and finding it too easy to fall asleep on those comfy sofas.

Also has an amazing beach themed outdoor area which is supposedly great for BBQs and definitely not a useless addition to a club in the tropical climate of Belfast.

4. Limelight

The coolest place in Limelight is the upstairs smoking area. Unfortunately everyone knows this, and it means your night out will be spent waiting in a queue for upstairs that’s longer than the one outside the club.

It’s is also the place where you’ll run into weirdos you used to be friends with when you wander out of Spring and Airbrake and into Limelight. What ensues will be an awkward conversation where you try to scream “What’s the craic with you these days” over Metallica and end up with a painful throat the next morning.

5. El Divino

Tries really really hard to be like an exotic night out in Ibiza, but really the West Coast Coolers, cheap white sofas and breathtaking view of the Lagan don’t count for much when it’s below freezing outside in tropical Belfast.

Ooh, it’s like I’m in Malia all over again.

6. The Bot

Just accept it, you’re going to fall down the stairs at some point in the night. And if you don’t damage yourself physically, you will definitely harm your bank balance at that ATM ominously close to the front door of Bot.

7. Villa

Where is Villa? What is Villa? Why is it all over my newsfeed? These are just a few of the questions we’ve all been asking as this new club has popped up in the arsehole of Belfast (where Yello used to be back in the day). Is it really as obnoxious and overbearing as the hordes of Villa PR staff (that probably used to be your friends) would have you believe? Only time will tell.

8. Filthy’s

Like an angry tumour or an STD in Elms, Filthy’s has spread like wildfire. From just one small bar to a whole “Quarter”, including a secret garden that’s totally freezing for the 11 and a half months of the year when it’s not sunny, and a cocktail bar that will get only get you drunk if you’re willing to waste half your student loan on fruity drinks. Is bigger actually better though?

9. Thompsons

Tucked away in a back alley of Belfast city centre Thompsons is the place you stumble to after your proper night out somewhere else, and by the time you’re home at 4am you want to forget about it forever (and you probably will by the next day – if you’re lucky).

10. Eivissa

Famous enough to play host to MIC’s own Spenny Matthews, Eivissa has sadly decided to close their doors. They had an emotional Facebook post about it and everything.

But despite the fact that Eivissa is now closing doesn’t mean you can’t do it a service and honour it posthumously by voting it Belfast’s worst night out.