Belfast bangs one out: porn stats expose what turns on NI’s biggest horndogs

PornHub proves private browsing isn’t so discreet as they thrust our filthy habits in the face of the public.


Well,well,well. It appears that all the history deleting in the world hasn’t stopped PornHub revealing scarily detailed statistics showing exactly how much time each part of the UK devotes to enjoying their site.

Region Pages per Visit Avg Visit Duration
Northern Ireland 8.67 00:09:35
Wales 8.68 00:09:38
England 8.77 00:09:42
Scotland 8.76 00:09:45

 

The filthy figures released by the site have shown us that Northern Ireland has a particular fondness for a lady named Lisa Ann. Despite her name being the most searched term in Northern Ireland, Wales and Scotland, until writing this I had no idea who Lisa Ann was. A Google search later and I’m not so clueless, it appears that she’s some sort of Queen of the Milfs. Stifler’s Mom has nothing on this woman.

Just a casual day at the office for ol’ Lisa Ann

Following lovely Lisa, “teachers” was the next most popular term searched in NI.

Culchies seem to have greater stamina than Belfast boys, with Omagh able to last a gasp inducing 9 minutes 46 on the site, whilst Belfast averages in at 9 minutes 35.  It must be all that country air and tractor driving. Lusty Lisburn only lasts  9 minutes 05 seconds, but considering there really isn’t much else to do in Lisburn we must sympathize.  Overall Northern Ireland lasts longer than the worldwide average which stands at a less than erotic 8.56. Doesn’t it make you proud?

Town               Visit duration           Pages per visit      # of visits
Belfast 09:35 6.68 1,416,980
Glengormley 09:09 6.59 24,876
Lisburn 09:05 6.66 20,886
Londonderry 09:15 6.42 53,643
Omagh 09:46 6.52 31,146
Portadown 09:42 6.78 34,701

 

What is most impressive about the stats is the amount of pages wankers from here were able to visit in such a short amount of time. In just over 9 minutes just under 9 pages of porn are shot through- surely that’s some sort of record? Northern Ireland, proving variety really is the spice of life.

A quick study break- clearly helps this guy relieve some tension

So next time you get an itch that needs scratching but don’t have access to an actual,physical human being- consider these statistics. See if you can break your own personal record! Nothing makes porn more exciting than loads of numbers. In the meantime I’m off to delete every single item on my internet history before somebody thinks I’ve got some sort of maths fetish.

Check your town with the table below: