How to get back with your ex for Valentines
I’ve changed, no, really…
It’s that time of year again, with the excesses of first semester firmly behind us and the allure of Yoko’s every night is starting to wear thin.
A good number of you will be starting to miss your number one bae back home or that summer love, something that’s only going to get worse as valentine’s day rapidly approaches. But why risk potentially meeting someone cool when you can just bang your ex until you remember why you broke up?
Chances are, if you want to get back with your ex for Valentine’s day just because the moves you bust to ‘Golddigga’ in Pier have been less successful than you hoped, you’re a bit of an asshole and were a bit of an asshole when you were with them.
That’s okay, a lot of the best people in the world are assholes, but it’s going to make things a bit harder due to the unlucky guy/girl actually knowing you.
If this sounds like you, you want to make it clear you’ve changed as a person. Actually changing is quite hard, so consider doing something superficial like joining a society or starting a sport.
Make sure it’s something you can sound passionate about without actually committing much to it – something like Amnesty or Unicef works perfectly as a way for you to show that you’re a good person now. The people that actually do care about these good causes might not appreciate it however…
You wanna do something chilled but sweet, followed by drinks where it’s “just so good to catch up”. Something like chips on the promenade that just happen to coincide with sunset, before meeting them for Vodka Tuesday later, the attention really is in the detail guys and girls.
But what if you read the above and just thought ‘that’s not me, I’m not in it for a quick shag, my ex truly was the one’? Just because your housemates outright refuse to deal with you when you get drunk and cry over them anymore doesn’t mean that getting back with your ex is a bad idea.
Sure you may have done something crazy like get kicked out of a pub for shouting obscenities at them, or harassed their mates about that friend of theirs you never quite trusted, but that was just your way of showing you cared.
If that’s you, you want to find them when their defences are down. Wait till they’ve just struck out so that their confidence is low and their blood-alcohol level is high, then swoop in like a kinda creepy, obsessive hawk. The closer it is to Valentine’s day, the better this works.
Of course if you’re mentally well adjusted and not either a creep or a weirdo, you should probably just do what everyone else does on Valentine’s day when single – absolutely nothing. Maybe at most make a Facebook post poking fun at your single status.
After all, when you set aside the cards, chocolates and flowers it’s just another day.