Forget AberSnow, Watersports are the sickest society on campus

We’re much more chilled


We’ve all seen them on their socials, strutting around The Mill in their Aber Snow hoodie, fake Ray Bans and snapbacks thinking they’re the coolest kids in town. Their beards are scraggy and hair deliberately messed up for a “bedhead” look. But that’s the problem with AberSnow: they try too hard to maintain their image. Remember when they handed out hundreds of condoms branded with their social sec’s face? It reeks of desperation.

Some might continue to believe their hype, but it’s about time the Aber masses face the truth: snowsports just aren’t cool any more. That crown belongs to another society. AberSnow is dead; long live Watersports.

Even yoko’s bouncers get in our squad photos

Sure snowsports have boarding and skiing, but any sexiness of the sport pales in comparison when you have to spend two hours travelling in a minivan to a dry slope shrouded in grey ski. And for what? An hour of queueing up and down in the cold winds of Llandudno, Milton Keynes or Gloucester. So exotic mate.

Once they realise there is no sexiness in pursuing their sport in the UK, all they have left is drinking and creeping in Yoko’s thinking they’re “so rad man” because they went to Rise festival two years ago and thought it was hilarious when their best buddy Charlie smoked a spliff and got naked in the snow. It was probably followed by Jake who necked a half bottle of peach Schnapps and tried to ski in a Borat mankini. Nice.

Really tho?

But now a growing number of people at uni are getting involved in watersports. It might be with surfing or sailing but the one certainty is they are living the coolest and booziest lifestyle of all societies. Watersports socials are known to be the rowdiest and best at university. And that’s just the beginning.

Look at what you can actually do with watersports. Kayaking in Wales is great, and there is phenomenal surfing to be done in the south west or, surprisingly, up in Scotland. Sure, it lacks a bit of glamour, but the point is the people don’t care. They’re doing something they truly enjoy with their mates in a location that caters to their needs, rather than settling for a crappy and fake alternative.

Just imagine going for a surf in that sunset…

That’s the main difference between snowsports and watersports: we just don’t care as much. As long as we’re boozing and chilling by the water we’re happy. We don’t mind how we look or where we are: doing something we love is enough. There’s no pretensions or need to live up to some cool exterior. We just want people to join in the fun.

The best kept secret of doing sports and getting loose in the Alps is to go when there’s no snow. When all has melted and the sun comes out, Val Thorens just looks like shit. Kayaking in the Alps is all the rage in the summer and when it comes to drinking shitty one Euro bottles of wine duck-taped to your hands, watersports are best. Lets face it, Lambrini and cheap vodka is made for chinning in sun, not the snow.

LOOSE

All it takes is a quick flick through various photos on Facebook as well to realise that people in sports like rowing and surfing look way fitter than snowsports as well. Maybe its the fact that they have regular access to their sports and actually exercise more than the two week heroes like Charlie or Jake.

Or maybe it’s something more spiritual, like water being the root of snow and ice. Without water there can be no snow. If Jesus is the snow then God is the water – this is what makes watersports the real sport of the gods.